It's almost 8 pm and I'm meeting Grayson soon.. I'm so stressed out, this happens every time I'm meeting him. I get worried, scared and I just feel fucking sick. It really shouldn't be this way, plus the thing I did makes it literally 10x worse. But I really just have to face it. I made a mistake, and I'll definitely learn from it.
I ubered to his house, and waiting on is front door. I knocked, without hesitation.
"Hey babe!", he said while pulling me into a hug aggressively.
I couldn't even smile.
"Listen Grayson, we have to talk. Please. Don't interupt me while I'm speaking, and please ask questions when I'm done." I said looking down.
He lifted my chin up, kissing me. Oh how good it felt having those soft lips on mine. I'm so weak for him.
We sat down on the couch.
"Okay, well. I'm extremely sorry for this. It's the worst thing I've ever done in my life, and I truly understand if you break up with me. Eh- I slept with your brother." The last sentence I said as fast as possible, just to be done with it.
"And I-", I didn't get to finish my sentence when Grayson interrupted.
"Y/N hehe, you're joking right? This is funny but you're really making me nervous."
"Grayson, I'm serious. And I'm fucking sorry. It was a mistake. I was missing you so much, I guess I used Ethan?"
"If you're being dead serious right now.. I don't even know what to do."
"Look, Gray, I'm sorry"
"YOU THINK SORRY IS GOING TO MAKE IT BETTER, HUH? FOR FUCK SAKE! NO! A SORRY WON'T DO ANYTHING FOR YOU AT THIS POINT." He screamed at me.
"Babe, please calm down. Let's just talk."
"OH REAALLY? ME? CALM DOWN? YOU SLEPT WITH MY FUCKING BROTHER. YOU HEAR THAT. MY BROTHER.
I'M GLAD HE'S OUT WITH FRIENDS NOW, IF NOT HE REALLY WOULD BE DEAD." His voice was starting to shake.
I stood up, trying to give him a hug. He pushed me down to the ground. Just like he pushed Ethan.
"I KNOW A SORRY WON'T MAKE ANYTHING BETTER, BUT CONTROL YOURSELF GRAYSON . I'M NOT YOUR FUCKING DOLL, YOU CAN'T JUST PUSH ME AND DO WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DO WITH ME."
"YOU PROBABLY DID THIS BACK IN JERSEY TOO, DIDN'T YOU? PLAYED WITH BOYS' EMOTIONS."
"DON'T EVER TALK ABOUT MY BACKGROUND IN JERSEY, YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT GRAYSON. SO KEEP YOUR DIRTY FUCKING MOUTH CLOSED." I screamed at him, as loud as I could, my voice was about to give up.
I got up and started to get my things, and I was heading out the door. Grayson was right behind me. He touched my shoulder, making me turn around. He was crying. Never have I seen him cry. He made me emotional, and I gave him a hug- but still being mad.
He pushed me away lightly. I tilted my head and raised my left eyebrow at him.
"Y/N, I'm- I don't think- I don't know anymore. I really can't believe what you did. But remember, I still love you. Please, this is really not goodbye but- but- I think I need some time to process this and think about everything. Bye, for now. Maybe I'll text you, but I don't know when."
"Goodbye, Grayson." And so I went out the door. Balling my eyes out. And so it went on for several days. I just couldn't stop crying.
Until he texted me.
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no one really reads my fanfic lol but-
Sorry for not posting. I just don't know anymore- Nadia
