It’s not like I meant to fall out of love with the Hanyou, but, in a way, he didn’t really give me a choice. In the beginning everything was great, but then, out of seemingly nowhere, it all went downhill. He became distant. It was as if he had shut me out.
I knew that she was the reason behind his behavior change. I honestly should have seen this coming because, after all, I am just her imitation to him. He hadn’t said that to me in a long time, but he had brought that insult back. It didn’t hurt as much as it used to, so the words weren’t as effective as he probably had hoped.
I started sneaking off, claiming I was bathing, just to get away from Inuyasha. I cried a lot for a few days, but one day someone stopped my tears. On that day, I was confronted by my Hanyou friend’s older brother. Though, I’m pretty sure that that confronted would be a bad word choice considering he didn’t say anything. It was a strange feeling having Sesshoumaru next to me, but it wasn’t a bad kind of strange. I enjoyed his presence very much.
After awhile I decided to tell him about my reasoning for crying because, although he didn’t say it, I had a feeling he wanted to know. Sesshoumaru never said a word, but I just knew he was listening. I would poor my heart out to this demon and he would actually listen. It was surreal, and somehow it became a daily habit of ours. I would go off into the woods and Sesshoumaru would always be there waiting.
Over the course of four months the demon lord and I had developed feelings for each other. It was something akin to love, but not quite there yet, at least I didn’t think so at the time. The lack of feeling I had towards Inuyasha felt bizarre to begin with, but eventually I was used to it. I stopped caring about the love I once held for my Hanyou friend and instead focused on Sesshoumaru. Not once did I feel bad either because, after all, I wasn’t an imitation to the elder of the two dog demons.
On the last day of those four months, Sesshoumaru invited me to travel with him, his ward, and his retainer indefinitely. This allegedly cold demon lord, who was supposed to hate humans, wanted me to travel with him and his own forever. I will tell you that I didn’t agree right away. I tried telling myself I shouldn’t because Sango, Shippou, and Miroku would miss me terribly. In the end I chose to stay with Sesshoumaru though because, I reasoned, I could still periodically visit with my companions. Inuyasha wouldn’t miss me, which I was sure of.
I told the demon lord of my decision and he briefly had joy flash through his eyes. I needed that brief glimpse to make me feel better about my decision. I smiled up at him, and he gathered me into his arms as we left. I had made my decision, and there was no going back now.
