I looked into my hands, one holding a water bottle and another some
sleeping pills. I had told everyone at school I was gonna do it and no one seemed to care, well Tyde cared. He always did. I saw the horrified look in his eyes when some students laughed and the teacher rolled her eyes. I was used to it though. My thoughts were disrupted by my phone ringing, it was Tyde's ringtone; him singing I see fire by Ed Sheeran. I wanted to pick it up but I didn't, i wanted to hear his beautiful voice for the last time.I pictured the horrified look on his face when I didn't answer my phone. I knew he was gonna come soon, so I decided to get it over with. I didn't even bother to write a long, lengthy note like you see in the movies. Everyone knew why I would do what I was gonna do, so why remind them? This isn't the movies, this is life. Real life.Except there was no happy ending. I drank some water then swallowed as many pills as I could. I started to feel dizzy, I knew the pills were working; good. I heard Tyde's footsteps and he suddenly burst through the door. I saw his dimpled smile, bright like the sun. But like the sun, it disappeared and his expression faded into a black starless night when he saw I already had my fair share of pills. He ran to my aid and caught me before I could fall. Tyde always did that for me, but this would be his last and final time. "Oh god Lillian, what did they do to you?," Tyde screamed. Oh if only he knew, it's not what they did to me but what I did to myself. " I'm gonna get help, you'll be ok. Hell you'll be more than ok and you can tell our kids how you survived when the world brought you down to your knees." He proceeded to cal 911 and next my parents. He was sobbing, but managed to say I love you 5 times. Oh how I wanted to hug him back and tell him I loved him too, but he would never hear me say it. I felt super drowsy. As Tyde started singing to me, I immediately regretted my haste decision. It's funny how you realise what your doing is wrong while doing it. Tyde, my beautiful Tyde was a sobbing mess and it was all my fault. I told myself to hang on, for him. He was always there for me and I let him down, more then down I was dying. Hold on hold on hold on I thought as I heard sirens then paramedics rush through the door. My parents wailing LILLIAN filled the air, mixing with Tyde's beautiful, yet shaky voice singing Buy the Stars. It was quite a depressing sound to be honest. Hold on for a few more minutes I thought. You owe it to Tyde, you owe your stupid useless self to him. I could see darkness closing in on me, but I didn't want to. My whole life I hated the dark. To me it symbolized being alone and lost and confused. But here it was, all these symbolic emotions closing in on me an nobody could do anything. I knew I wasnt telling our kids my story,let alone have any kids;but I continued chanting hold on hold on hol......
