I was betrayed by who I thought was my lover
I was betrayed by who I thought was a friend.
I get a head rush just for trying to stand up for myself.
I'm no longer thourough bred, first place pedistool.
I am unscrewed and falling apart
I an standing dead last with my demons consuming and beating me up.
When the kid in me falls I will pick them up. Dust them off. Then have them go, there is no race against yourself but I am dealing with lies. And cheats. And excuses. Frauds and those unloyal and fake. I can't stand winner circle , thruorough bred, so I will stand in my flashing red and smile and say "You made it." I will stand at the top waiting and smile and say "You made it."
But you can't reach anywhere at where we are. We are lost in a dream.
In my dream, where reality and false weave together the tongue of the shoes of my mind and tell me to walk forward.
I can't step forward when the ground I thought I once had is no longer solodified, is a twisted web of lies and insecurity.
Those who I thought were loyal are gone.
Those who I thought were real, are nothing but fakes or liars or whores.
The friends that stayed though... They... Watched me suffer. They watched me suffer in pain and split my skin.
My body is now a previous war zone.
The trenches of my suffering raised up and burn.
I am reminded every time I look in the mirror.
I am reminded every time I shed my clothes and show my "purest form" which has been tainted with blood and lies and cowards hiding.
