Go Fuck Thyself

Sharp as a Knife

The school campus is scattered with people still rubbing their eyes, coffee in their hands making their way to their first classes. With a coffee of my own in my hands, I walk down a path lined with roses admiring the brilliant colors of the sunrise as the sun slowly creeps out from the building in front of me. My first class of the day, the Inner Workings of the Human Brain, is aggravatingly boring today and it takes all of my will power not drift off into sleep. Eyelids heavy I eventually give into the exhaustion and rest my head in my arms on the desk before me. After my wonderful nap I float through the rest of my day in a groggy haze. I waste away my college tuition not paying attention in any of my classes. My only relief comes when the day is done and I make my way down downtown to finally eat a meal that is not microwaveable mac and cheese.

Downtown is busy as always but it's refreshing after spending so much time in isolation. The bruising around my eye is still present earning me many stares but a glare from me has them averting their eyes. A stupid excitement fills me when I spot my destination, the best sushi restaurant in the world. After a meal of mouthwatering sushi it is back to my dorm and I am not leaving for the next weak (if I can survive on microwave meals for that long).

In my bed the night becomes dark and lonely as I long for the soft touch of someones hands running through my hands. A tear trickles down my cheek followed by two, then three more, until the trickle turns into a stream. A knock comes from my door and my whole body goes rigid. There is a pause and I'm sure the person has left but to my dismay a louder knock follows shortly after. Slowly, my entire body shaking I stubble towards the door, praying to god that the person behind it does not bring trouble.

"Hello? Whose th-there?", I inquire, my voice trembling, practically inaudible.

"Open the fucking door bitch! That stunt you pulled yesterday, I'm sure you got a kick out of that! I am going to make you pay!" The screams of Levi's voice reverberate throughout the hallway and through my soul.

SHIT..... FUCK..... SHIT. A million thoughts race through my mind as I frantically try to figure out what to do and how to keep my head. My phone, I need my phone. He starts pounding on the door curses spewing out of his mouth. The commotion he is making has stirred others in my dorm hall but he warns them to stay back and they comply. He doesn't move from his position at my door. He has a knife in hand, I learn when I hear the frightened voice in the hall that begs him to put it down and leave me alone. 911. I need to call 911. When I finally reach my phone I quickly dial the number and plead for them to send the police. After the call I rummage throughout my room desperate to find anything I can use to defend myself. The only thing I can manage to find are the thick textbooks under my bed. Hey at least these will be of some use to me. Shut up brain and stop fucking around for once!

I can hear the wood of the door splinter and I know it won't be long before he breaks through. I may as well say goodbye now as I won't last long. What should I say though? I have no one to say goodbye to and no god to pray to. At least I won't be missed.... The door cracks open and he steps through a smile on his face and a knife in hand. This is some Shining shit.... really your about to fucking die and you are thinking of the fucking SHINING?!?! He comes closer to me each step echoing in my ears. Close by, sirens wail and I plead to anyone who is listening to let them reach me in time. Every step he takes towards me I can feel a piece of me leaving as I await for the end to come.

The room is a blur and my head is spinning but I can hear the shouts of police officers and the crazed screams of Levi ringing in my ears. Someone is asking me questions but I can't make out what they are trying to say. There's a sharp pain in my head and my vision becomes hazy. I try to hold on to conciseness but it slips away from me and the world around me goes dark. 

A glaring light greets me when I open my eyes, squinting, I roll over on the hard hospital bed under my back. Three nurses rush to my side and check my blood pressure and other vitals explaining to me I had passed out right after the police arrived due to extreme fear. I am to be released from the hospital in an hour they inform me after which I drift off into a fitful sleep. My dreams are filled with the horrors of the night before from which I wake up with tears sliding down my face.

An hour passed and I was dismissed from the hospital with a band wrapped around my bruised wrist. I had hoped my first time to a hospital would be because I had done something reckless; not because my ex tried to stick a knife in me. I have no car and no one to take me home so I aimlessly wander throughout downtown wary of every eye that falls on me.

Around every corner my throat tightens as my mind keeps on telling me he will be there. A motorcycle revs in the distance and I go stalk still anxiety consuming me. Someone must have noticed the change in me as there is a hand on my shoulder.

"Don't touch me!!", I yell and their hand quickly moves from my shoulder as if it had suddenly caught on fire.

"What the fuck bitch?! Are you crazy or something?", The man who is now standing several safe feet away shouts at me looking as if he is ready for a fight.

"I'm fine. Leave. Me. Alone."

"I was just trying to be nice bitch, but girls think every man that approaches them is going to fucking rape them."

"Please leave me the fuck alone..."

By now the scene has drawn a crowd of on lookers too pussy to do anything. My eyes plead at them to help me as I cower from the man now staring me down, probably deciding whether or not he wants to hurt a girl. I need to get away from him but my feet won't move, I am paralyzed. Another mans voice cries out, this one with no hate in his voice only fear.

"Leave her alone asshole! She's done nothing. Leave her alone.... please.", The new mans voice pleads for my sake as he cautiously approaches my aggressor.

"Do you want to fight fucker? You won't last for long though, from the looks of you i'll have you down in seconds."

The two men approach each other, my aggressor laughing manically as the other rolls up his sleeves to reveal toned muscles. Fear shows in the aggressors eyes when the realization that this may be a fight he will not win.  My aggressor pounces leading the other into an offensive position.

Their bodies are a whirl of fists, legs, and blood. Their grunts of pain and exhaustion can be heard and the onlookers wide eyed silently make bets on who will win. A loud thud sounds throughout the street and looking up I find the aggressors body splayed out on the ground. Blood covers both of their faces and to my relief they are both still breathing. The crowd of onlookers disperse wanting to pretend they are innocent. The stranger who came out victorious looks around stunned as if he can not believe what he has done. Sirens wail and I leave the area not wanting to face the police again.