The Girl Next Door

Part Six

"Thank you nurse, I will see you out," her mother coldly offers as Regina sits patiently on top of the stairs with her knees bouncing from anticipation.

The moment she observes her mother leading the nurse to the front door, she jumps to her feet and scurries to her father's room without another thought. The hospice nurse was there for about an hour today, checking his vitals, moving and stretching his legs and feet for circulation and then supplying his medication and it's all too routine by now.

She lightly taps her knuckles against her father's door, timidly peeking her head inside because she knows his body is exhausted from the visit and she truly doesn't want to disturb him, but her heart is aching to be near him. Her hands are already trembling as her eyes land upon his weak, frail body and it's impossible not to notice that there's no color left in his face, just the washed-out grey hue that leaves a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"You know you don't have to knock, sweetheart," her dad claims with an unfamiliar voice that's thick with grogginess.

Her lips form a tight knit line while she nods along and slowly creeps into his room as if it were some spooky haunted house filled with her biggest fears in life. And that's exactly what this room represents now. She tugs nervously on her own fingers, her body growing more anxious with each step she claims closer to her father. Big brown eyes remain strained to his hands that rest calmly next to his side and as much as she wants to see her father and memorize every detail about him, she can't bear to meet his gaze.

She carefully drags a chair next to his bed and sits down quietly, still avoiding any true eye contact. She focuses on her own fingers, fiddling with all the apprehension her body possesses. She's just not able to find her voice yet or maybe she is waiting for him to strike up a casual conversation, so they could pretend for just a moment that everything is okay.

"Regina, look at me sweetie."

That simple command creates hot tears, that she so hopelessly begs not to fall. She knows crying isn't helping her father the least bit and she's sure it will only make him feel guilty, knowing his sickness is causing her pain. She bites down hard on the inside of her trembling lip as she peers up at her father through the thick liquid clinging desperately to her eyes. The moment her eyes meet her father's, her chest constricts painfully tight, causing her to wince.

"Daddy, I don't know what I am going to do without you," she blurts out suddenly as the tears become too much and spill down her cheeks. "How am I supposed to go on with my life, not being able to hear your comforting voice? I won't be able to live without your amazing advice. How can I live in this house without your infectious laugh? How am I supposed to learn anything new without your incredible patience? Daddy, how am I going to survive with mother? She hates me."

The words come pouring out of her mouth like they have been locked away for so long, just bursting at the seams to come spewing out. Honestly, it feels so good to finally relieve the pressure from carrying around these heavy thoughts, but speaking the truth doesn't eliminate the pain of the inevitable.

"Regina, your mother does not hate you."

"Yes, she does daddy," she cries out, a heavy sob escaping her mouth from the truth she feels caged inside her heart. "She has such a carefree and easy-going relationship with Zelena, but with me...she's controlling and...and just mean!"

"Who doesn't have a carefree and easy-going relationship with Zelena? That's just how your sister is." Regina sighs from her father's attempt to sit up a little bit in his bed so they can properly speak to one another. "Listen Regina, your mother does not hate you. When your sister was born, she was defiant and wickedly crazy. Your sister drove us mad, I'm actually wondering now, how we thought having another child was a good idea," he chuckles, persuading her to roll her watery eyes at his lame attempt at humor.