Discombobulated Thoughts

Something Eloquent, I Suck

And here I am, sinking low again

I hate it, hate how my mood can be so quickly squandered

I don't really know why I feel the way I do, whether I expected a different response or whether it's just pure animosity directed towards myself

I'll say this, I don't know how I'll ever make conversation at this point

I'd like to learn more about her, compliment her, to say "Your eyes are really beautiful, soft and gentle."

That's not weird

Is it?

Why do I find it so hard to simply talk with her, I could only squeeze out her name when I handed her the card and chocolates

It shouldn't be this hard, I can illustrate my thoughts well while typing and writing, it's just so much harder in person

Well, that's not true, after all I can't even write

Do I always have to sink down? "Aww, poor you." Does it ever get me any closer to accomplishing my goal?

Yes. No. Maybe. I don't know

I don't deserve her, I don't deserve anyone, not if I can dream so brightly yet fail to do something so simple