Imagine you’re in a van slowly driving by the coastal beaches of California as the sun sets. The ginger blonde light of the sun slowly fades behind the turquoise of the nearly transparent ocean. The clouds in the sky are white cotton and the newly lit moon peaks through them. As for the stars in the sky, they sprinkle the blue above. Though it’s not as nice as it sounds. Not when the van you’re in has an annoying little sibling complaining about the traffic on this dumb highway.
Even with my headphones blaring Kings of Leon, I can still hear the voice of my mother trying to calm down my snobbish younger sister by 5 years, Avery. With my dad snoring in the front seat and my older sister, Hillary’s, terrible and jerky driving, this was a long trip. For over 12 hours, we drove through Oregon. “I've been roaming around, Always looking down at all I see.” The song came to an end.
My mom started reprimanding me about how I should be taking care of my younger sibling as I’m a “legal adult” which is an excuse for my parents to put their responsibilities on me but not give me any more rights. I looked outside and waited until we finally reached the hotel.
I look through my black backpack for gum. I pop a piece in my mouth and keep looking out the window. The car slowed down and started getting jerky. “Shit!” I heard Hillary yell as the car completely stopped.
“Language please!” My mother chastised. We ran out of gas, great. We all out of the car, as I looked around. Okay, okay, there is nothing, nobody, and naught here. There’s a faint light coming from about five miles down. My parents sent me to go get a gallon of gas. Walking there was easy. When I got here I bought the gas and a pack of cigarettes. I stuffed the box into my jacket pocket and walked back to my family. We continued driving after that. When we finally pulled into the decorative parking lot. My dad handed a $50 bill to the bellboy to take our bags. We don’t take our nice cars to beaches because my mom says there’s “just too much sand.” And so we have to take our shit rundown van.
As we were waiting outside in the cold, dark lot for the bellboy to send our bags to our room. As I was thinking about when I would finally be able to smoke, a dark-red Mercedes drive into the lot behind us. A girl with tan skin and black, wavy hair walked out, about my age.
“Can you get off your goddamn phone, please?” The brother snapped. She rolled her brown eyes.
“Calm down,” She mockingly appeased. “I’m texting mom that we got here.”
“Okay, just put it away when you’re done.”
“Alright. You only asked me once.” She defended and slid it into her back pocket. “Can we wait inside please?”
“Why?”
“I’m cold.”
“I told you not to wear those shorts.”
“I didn’t know it would be cold.”
“How often do we come to this hotel? Huh?”
“Every summer…”
“Exactly.”
“Okay, fine. You’re right. I’m wrong. Can we go inside now?”
“I know I’m right. But, no. Suck it up, and stop complaining.”
“So, Avery…” I started and she looked up from her phone, looking a bit bewildered. “How’s school going?”
“Fine, I guess.” She swiftly answered and then went back to her screen. I’m going to hold a conversation with my little sister.
“Are you nervous for high school next year?”
“I guess.” She shrugged. Of course she does, all this girl does is guess.
“Is there anything interesting you have to say?”
“No, not really.” She shrugged. I watched the girl again as I realized that I’m the shittiest brother.
“You’re mean.” She scowled at her brother. He wrapped his arm around her and she snuggled into him. “You smell like perfume.” She laughed.
“Cologne.”
“Girly cologne?”
“Fuck you.”
“Sorry for being honest.”
“You’re not being honest! I don’t smell girly.”
“Okay… You definitely don’t smell girly at all.”
“Hey cut your sarcasm shit.”
“Or what?”
“Or I’ll tickle you.”
“Okay, okay. There’s nothing wrong with smelling girly.”
“Stop.”
“You smell nice!”
“If you say one more thing about this… for fuck sake.”
“You’re so boring! Loosen up a little.” A large white Mercedes came into the lot and almost crashed into their red car. The woman in the car started yelling at the man driving with the curly hair and Aloha-print shirt. He honked for the cars to move when the girl’s brother awkwardly waved to the late 40’s couple. The woman gestured to them and they both got out of the car.
“Look who’s here!” The man with the curly hair excitedly said. They both rolled their eyes, and the girl and her brother walked into the lobby and sat on the couch near the front desk as her parents went to pick up the room keys.
“Don’t lose this.” Her brother warned and handed her the key.
“I should be saying that to you.”
“Oh ha-ha you’re so funny.” He flipped her off.
“Put that away!” She scolded and looked the most offended she could. She caught me staring at her. She smiled and blushed a little as I quickly looked at anything but her, which ended up being the ceiling. Ten minutes into the vacation and a girl is laughing at you for gawking at her. Smooth, Michael, smooth.
When I finally got up to my room, I went to the porch and lit one. The warm feeling flooded my lungs, my head clouded up, and I felt relaxed instantly. It’s the only thing that makes me feel still slightly alive. Before I knew it, there was not much left to smoke. I threw the butt on the ground and crushed it with my white converse low top. Being too lazy to change, I slept in the same clothes.
In the morning, I smoked again. Then I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and shower so that my family wouldn’t smell the scent of ashes on me. If they knew, they would flip out. But I am an adult so I don’t give a fuck. The shower gel smelled girly but I had to deal with it. After calling Avery and asking if she wanted to go and eat breakfast with me, I saw the girl at the buffet. I avoided eye contact the best I could but I’m pretty sure she saw me looking at her again. I don’t even know her, so I definitely don’t want her to think I’m a freak already.
We’re going to the boardwalk today. My parents think it’s a good idea to spend the entire say out in the scorching sun as our family bonds by eating junk food and trying to win rigged carnival games. That’s the best place to share family love- where sand is literally everywhere and there are people yelling and carnival noises are every-fucking-where you go.
When we got there, parking was literally impossible to find. Hillary kept snap-chatting her boyfriend stupid pictures of half her face and kept commenting on how she can’t eat anything at the carnival stands because she is on a ‘no carb diet’ which is literally the stupidest fucking thing I’ve ever heard. Avery kept texting her friends about how ‘lame’ our parents are and how she’s ‘gonna get soooo tan @ da beach!!!’ and wishes ‘there’ll be cuh-yoot boys there!! ☺’. Is that how girls are these days? When we finally got parking, it was miles away. I kicked pebbles with my old shoes all the way to the entrance.
“Michael?” Mom called.
“Yeah?” I mumbled.
“I need you to stay with Avery.”
“But…” Avery burst out. “I wanted to go on rollercoasters!”
“And why can’t Michael go on them with you?” Mom questioned.
“But going with your brother is lame!” Avery accused.
“Stop being so fucking bratty, Avery.” I blurted without thinking. She looked like she was thinking of something to say back but all she said was,
“I’m not a brat.”
“If you want to go on rollercoasters, we can. You’re just a kid.” I said bluntly and my mom shot me a look. I gave her one that said, don’t worry I’m handling this. “Now, you can pick one and we can have fun, or you can keep being a little brat and we will sit around for the next couple of hours doing nothing. Your choice.” She requested one of them, looking like she was about to cry and we stood in line.
“I don’t know why you’re sad.” I stated dully.
“You’re being mean.” She muttered.
“How so?”
“You were mean to me.”
“When?”
“Earlier.”
“Oh, you mean the earlier where you said that being out in public with me was “lame”? That earlier, Avery?”
“I didn’t mean it like that.”
“I only know one way of taking that, Avery.” The only reason I wasn’t treating my sister like the little princess she thinks she is, is because I don’t want her to grow up with the thought that the world isn’t always going to be nice to her. She can’t be acting like a little brat and have nobody say anything about it, which is exactly what my parents do because they don’t want to make her cry like I’m doing now. She dried her tears with the end of her dark purple sweater. I put one arm around her, to comfort her, and she didn’t move which usually means that she isn’t completely pissed off at me.
“Are you okay?” I questioned after a couple of minutes of silence.
“Yeah.” She smiled faintly and look a micro-step closer to me.
I saw the girl from last night and she was so close, only a couple of dozen people behind us. After around 15 minutes, the large group after us decided to leave because the line was moving too slowly.
“Do we have to go on this?” The brother asked.
“Yes! This ride is so much fun, I promise.” She smiled and bit her soft serve.
“You can bite ice cream?” He asked in awe, and she nodded because her mouth was full, “That shit hurts my teeth.”
“You… are… weak.” She said solemnly, but grinning.
“Am not.” He shot back.
“Suuurrreeee.” She replied while rolling her eyes.
“I’m done with your bullshit.” The brother scowled at her but then smiled soon after because she was smiling at him.
“Avery, this is taking a long time.” I groaned.
“Sure is.” She replied with smile.
“Why are you all smiley?” I asked, dubiously.
“I’m spending time with my older brother.” She said in a wholesome way.
“Okay… What do you want?” I knew she was up to something.
“There’s a really nice pair of heels that I found…” She started and I shook my head, grinning. “Now, before you say no… They are only $300.” My eyes almost popped out of my head.
“How is $300 cheap?” I asked, astonished at my sister’s value assessing skills.
“They are for Alexander Wang!” She defended. “I just need $100.” I reached into my pocket, pulled out five $20 bills and handed them to my little sister. “Seriously?” She awed.
“Take it before I realize that it’s a terrible decision.” And with that, she took the bills from my hand and kept a smile that was a little too big for her face.
“Thank you.” She said and hugged me. I saw the girl looking at us a smiling as she said,
“See? Sometimes brothers can be nice.” And her brother playfully hit her arm. She thinks I’m nice, that’s a lie.
I felt like dying, not only during, but after the ride too. Damn rollercoasters make me nauseous. Avery suggested getting food but I didn’t feel so sure about that. After stomach settled a little, we decided to get funnel cake. We “shared” one, which was her picking small pieces off of the tray and me shoving most of it in my mouth. That’s usually the way it goes. When afternoon came, my family met in front of the boardwalk gates, and we drove back to the hotel for dinner.
We were sent to our rooms to get dressed into something formal for the restaurant. I looked back at my reflection. I looked terrible. I wore a plaid red button down shirt and black trousers. My curly brown hair was messy, and my ugly green eyes stared intensely at the eyes back in the mirror for a minute. I tried to fix my hair, make it look less screwed up, but I just ended up making it worse. The curls were a mess and they didn’t settle. I am never going to content with myself, I thought as I stepped out of my hotel room and pressed the elevator button. When I finally got downstairs, my family was there waiting for me.
“You’re late.” My father said without looking up from the menu.
“Sorry, the elevator took a while to come to my floor.” I replied.
“Excuses will only last for so long, Michael.” My mom interposed.
“Yes mother.” I replied respectfully. What does that even mean?
“Ugh.” Avery groaned.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“My selfie on Insta only got 100 likes in the last hour. Should I delete it?” She asked seriously and now I was the one groaning. Instead of answering, I gave her the most serious I don’t give a fuck face that I have every done. The girl walked into the restaurant and went to her table. She was wearing a simple black dress.
“You’re late.” Her brother reprimanded.
“Yeah.”
“Yeah?”
“Five minutes late. Whatever.”
“It’s not ‘whatever.’” Her brother mocked the word, “I was worried about you, why didn’t you pick up your phone?”
“No, I was already on my way.” She laughed, “Calm down, I’m here now.”
“Do you hear this?” My brother criticized to her parents. “This girl’s freedom is getting to her head.”
“I can actually survive without being checked on every. five. minutes. Thank you very much.” She sarcastically replied and the waiter came to their table. After they ordered, the brother spoke again.
“Your dress is very short.”
“No it’s not.”
“Do you really want that kind of attention?” He looked disappointed.
“I’m not looking for any kind of attention.”
“I’m just saying…”
“Well you should stop.” She cut him off.
Dinner mainly consisted of me listening to the girl’s conversations rather than my own family’s. I did talk to my parents a little, but that ended when they tried to talk me into going to community college. After dinner the girl left before the rest of her family because she “wasn’t feeling well”. While I was walking back to the elevators I saw her already waiting there for one. Oh what the hell, the brave side of me said, just talk to her.
“Hello.” I said.
“Hello.” She smiled politely.
“I’m Michel.”
“Macie.”
“It’s nice to meet you.”
“You too.”
“Are you here for the summer?” Stupid question- but I had to ask something.
“Yeah. I’m sort-of here for a ‘family vacation’.”
“Me too.”
“Do you come here often? I’ve never seen you before.”
“No this is my first time actually, I’m from Oregon.”
“I love Oregon!”
“Really? I hate it there.”
The elevator came and we stepped inside. She pressed 4 and I pressed 6.
“Aw… why?”
“Too rainy.”
“Well don’t worry, you won’t get any of that here.”
“So… Are there any nice places to go to?” I attempted.
“Sometimes I go to a club down the street.”
“Are you thinking of going any time soon?”
“Maybe. My parents would kill me if they found out, though. And they check on me literally every 5 minutes.” She chattered. “Four texts, have you reached, call when you reach, seriously is the elevator that slow?, Macie text me ASAP.” She typed in ‘I’ve reached and the door is locked now let me be.’
“We could go together.” I said. “My parents would kill me too.”
“Cute… but I’m not that easy. Sorry.” She said sassily and tried to tug the ends of her dress down subtly.
“Whoa, hold up. Neither am I.” I recovered. “I was just saying, maybe you wouldn’t feel so threated if someone else died in the process with you?” Just stop talking Michael.
“Oh, really?” She sarcastically remarked, “So what wasn’t an attempt to flirt with me?” Her eyes are so beautiful.
“No, not at all. I was just being friendly and nobody else is a late teenager here.” I said in the best phony polite voice.
“Oh… Okay.” She said. "I would love to.”
“What?” I questioned.
“I would love to go to this dance place with you.” She said, but then quickly added, “But not as a date or anything. I’m in room 255. Can you come by in like half an hour?” And right at the exact time, the elevator was on the 4th floor. When the door closed, I smiled like an idiot to myself.
At exactly when she told me to, I came to room 255 and she was already waiting outside. She was wearing . We walked to the club in the dark.
“So in case we get caught by my parents or brother outside the hotel or in the hotel, I got lost looking for a convenient store and you were helping me back to the hotel and we don’t know each other, okay?”
“Wow you’ve really got it all planned out.” I said.
“Because I’m terrible at lying.” She laughed.
“It’s not that much of a lie to say that we don’t know each other.”
“I know that you are nice and you know that I’m sassy. What more is there, really?”
“You think I’m nice?”
“I know you’re nice.”
“How?”
“A not-nice guy wouldn’t take me out to this dance thing.”
“What do you mean?” I asked and she sighed.
“I mean… I’m not even pretty.” She stopped as she said this, “Why did you offer to take me?” Who wouldn’t?
“I’m cordial.” I shrugged, “And you are pretty. Beautiful, actually.”
“Suuurrreee.” She said dully.
“Everybody would believe that you were an actual drawing if you acted like artwork in a gallery. You’re that gorgeous.” I blundered.
“Okay, whatever.”
The club was crowded and smelled heavily of alcohol. Drunk people flooded the dance floor every time what seemed like the same generic electro-pop song came on. I found it quite boring but I didn’t want to drag Macie out.
“Are you having fun?” I yelled.
“No not really. Do you want to leave?” She shouted and I felt instantly thankful.
“I would.” I tried to bark over the music back. We were walking back when we saw a small Café that was open. I raised my eyebrow at her and she smiled and we both walked in. Sugar, coffee, and warmth flooded us as we stepped towards the wooden order table. My eyes shifted from the wood floors, to the small black metal stools, to the small fan on the ceiling, and the vintage pictures pinned on the walls.
“I’ll pay for you, okay?” I asked.
“What, no! We’re not on a date and I can pay for myself very well, thank you.”
“I know you can pay for yourself, I saw your Mercedes.” I started, “But you did drag me to that awful club and now the least you could do is simply allow me to buy you a coffee.”
“First of all, I didn’t drag you to the club, you offered to come with me. Second of all, that doesn’t even make sense!”
“There are people coming in. Now, may I please have the honor of buying the beautiful Macie a humble coffee?” And she sighed her cute little sigh and said okay. “Go ahead, order.” I smiled.
“A small vanilla latte, please?” She asked politely.
“Two.” I added and smiled at her. She rolled her eyes but smiled too. After getting our warm cups of delight, se decided to take a small walk. We found a ground fountain and Macie took off her heels and did twirls in the water with her bare feet. After 10 minutes, she was getting cold, so she took her heels in her hand and walked barefoot back to the hotel. Halfway through I told her that it would be terrible if she stepped on something and her foot got hurt, so I carried her, and she laughed hard. When we got to the hotel, the look on the hotel workers when she walked in with her dirty bare feet was priceless. She didn’t even seem to notice, and if her heels didn’t look costly, they probably would have stopped her to make sure that she even had a room here. I dropped her at her room and was about to leave. She was about to go inside when I reached for her hand and pulled her back.
I stepped toward her without hesitating and put my hands on her waist and my lips on her lips at the same time. Her small hands pressed slightly against my chest and I breathed her in. After what seemed like a century and a millisecond, we drew apart. Her lips were pinker than before and her hands were warmer. She was blushing wildly and her eyes were full of life.
“Goodnight, Michael.” She oozed and giggled.
“Goodnight, Macie.” I awed.
“Gosh, this is so tacky.” She mumbled so softly, it was almost whispered. She smiled at me one last time and then closed her door, as I was still standing there with a dumbfound smile on my face like an idiot. That night, my last thought was Macie’s soft lips.
A loud knocking came from my door. I groaned and lugged out of bed. When I opened the door, Avery was standing there with the biggest smile on her face.
“Guess what? Guess what? Guess what?” the excitement at such an early time gave me a headache. Scratch that, it was noon.
“Just. Tell. Me.” I muttered.
“There’s a free concert just down the street, tonight!”
“Okay…”
“But it’s 18 and over… so… I really really really need you to come with me.”
“Can Macie come?” I asked.
“Who’s Macie?” She questioned.
“A friend.” I said and she looked surprised, “Oh my gosh Michael can make a friend who knew?” I mocked her thoughts.
“No it’s just that you don’t really talk to girls.” She said truthfully.
“She’s… She’s something else.” I sighed.
“She’s lesbian?”
“What? No. What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“Everything. Of course she can come. Is that a yes?” She chattered.
“Sure.” I smiled. More time with Macie is the only thing I want. We went down for lunch, and when the elevator opened, Macie was there with her brother. Her eyes widened a little but she didn’t have any significant reaction. When I entered the elevator, I stayed silent.
After lunch, I went to the washroom only to find her brother there.
“Hey man.” He called out for my attention.
The world stopped. Shit shit shit. He knew. He knew that I took her away from the hotel. He must have seen us. Did he know about the bar? Maybe if I explained. Maybe if I was still alive to apologize. She had a good time. Maybe she didn’t. What if my kiss was too much? I probably made her uncomfortable. So uncomfortable that she had to tell her brother just to get me away from her. Is he going to beat my face in? I would prefer he did it in a less public place. I won’t fight back. I can’t even fight, but I deserve this. Shit. Why didn’t I juts listen to Macie when she said her parents would kill her? Fuck, I won’t even be able to see her again. I really hope I can make this up to her. How could I have been so irresponsible? I had one chance.
“Y-yes?” I hastily asked.
“I like your shirt.” He replied smugly. I could breathe a little now. “Reminds me of… Coffee.” I’m. So. Fucking. Dead.
“Uh, I, uh…” I stammered and he amusedly raised an eyebrow. I was about to go on an apologetic rant when he spoke.
“Don’t think of it too much.” He grinned and walked out of the room, leaving me alone and dumbfounded. I went out and Avery sent me a text saying that she was going back to her room to find what she’s going to wear for the concert.
When I was walking back to the elevators, I saw Macie waiting for one already. She was alone, but I decided against talking to her and turned around to walk the other way. I’m not sure what I’m planning on doing: I think it was just loitering around until she left but when I was walking back she called out for me. I think about pretending I didn’t hear her, but she was already right behind me and tapping my shoulder. When I turned around she looks anxious and happy.
“Hey.” She says softly.
“Hello.” I’m nervous as hell.
“Did my brother talk to you?” She’s straightforward.
“Not really…” I drifted off. “I was fucking terrified.”
“Why?”
“I don’t want you to get in trouble.”
“That’s so thoughtful.” She admired.
“And I didn’t want my face to get beaten in.”
“Oh no! My brother would never beat someone up. He’s not like that at all.” She explained, “The worst he would do is just swear a lot.”
“Oh, joy.” I sighed.
“But he was okay with our little excursion.” She said and my eyes snapped up.
“Did you tell him?” I asked softly.
“I made sure you wouldn’t get in trouble first.” She defended.
“What did you say?” I reproached.
“I just said that I met a nice boy and we went for coffee.”
“What about… the kiss?” I gently murmured.
“No!” She whisper-exclaimed, and then stated “I literally said, ‘I met a nice boy and we went for coffee’ and he asked if you were an asshole, and I said ‘not at all’ and that was basically it.”
“Oh.”
“I’m 18 years old. He doesn’t have a say in what I do anyways.” She huffed.
“No, I know. I just got worried because I have a little sister and my reaction wouldn’t have been quite the same.”
“You wouldn’t have done anything different.” She doubted.
“Meaning?”
“If this happened to your sister, I’m 99% sure you would have reacted exactly like my brother. You wouldn’t beat him up, you would just ask a couple of questions to your sister and then be done with it. You wouldn’t talk to him, similarly.” I debated on telling her about our bathroom chat but didn’t even have the chance when behind her, came her brother.
“Hey Mace.” He smiled. “Hey nice boy.” He mocked.
“Hello.” I said and my voice came out smaller than I needed it to be.
“His name is Michael.” She told him.
“Michael.” He said leisurely. “I don’t know Michael very well, do I?” He asked, looking directly at me. I felt like a fucking frightened kitten.
“Uh… N-no?” I answered, more like guessed his answer.
“We should go out for dinner then.” He stated.
“We could go to In-N-Out!” Macie squeaked.
“I think it would be better if it was just the two of us, Mace.”
“Sorry, I- uh, I promised to take my sister out to a concert tonight.” I pathetically defended.
“What concert?” She asks.
“It’s some free one down the street."
“I love concerts!” Macie’s buoyancy filled the lobby.
“I’ll come too.” Her brother added.
“Oooohhhh, can we get In-N-Out before it?” Macie beamed, holding her brother’s buff arm with her little hands. Her brother looked at her like he was seeing an adorable baby cat.
“Sure Mace.” He grinned.
“YAY!!!” She gleamed, “Wait! What will I wear?!” She ran up the stairs to find concert attire because the elevator was too slow.
“Now.” He started, “Now we can talk.”
I gulped. Fuck. Perhaps if I defended myself now. What the hell would I say? Your sister was too beautiful and funny and amazing to stay away from? What if my embrace happened too fast for her? I definitely made her feel awkward.
I took a lone risk and it didn’t work to my favor.
“Man relax.” He read my thoughts. “I just want to make sure that you’re not going to hurt my little sister.”
“I won’t.”
“How can I be sure of that?”
“She’s very lovely. I would never hurt her.”
“Sometimes these things are unintentional. She’s very fragile.”
“I will treat her well.”
“I hope so. But, if you do fuck up, I’m just here to tell you that there are no second chances. She’s too soft to have her heart treated like a toy.”
“I would never play with her heart.”
“Sometimes these things are unintentional.” He repeated. I nodded. “You can be with her now. I’m just trying to protect her. She’s been though lots of shit.” He said and exited the lobby.
The concert was very crowded. Macie was singing along and crying during the opening act itself, where Vampire Weekend sang Hannah Hunt. The rest of the concert was a dizzy, crowded, exciting blur. When we got back to the hotel, Avery went to her room alone, because I had to drop Macie off. When we got to her door and I was about to leave, she took a step towards me. She took my cold, hard hands into her small soft hands and entangled our fingers together. She stared dreamily into my eyes for about a minute before leaning in and kissing me. My stomach was fluttering with little butterflies and she whispered, thank you, before closing the door. I left feeling very happy. That night, my last thought was Macie’s brother’s words, telling me that I only had one chance with her soft lips.
The next month revolved around Macie. We spent every day of June together, and I didn’t take a second of it for granted. After the fist week of being together, she started sleeping over at my room. We would cuddle and kiss a lot and fall asleep besides the sounds of the ocean. It was very nice, actually. Macie’s skin was so soft, I couldn’t tell the difference between her and the down comforter. Some days were spent chilling in the hotel room, watching Netflix. Others were spent outside, at the boardwalk or just walking walks on the beach. We lost track of time. We laughed often. It seemed like it was just us, and we were a team. A club that nobody could join. I didn’t even want to consider thinking about the end of summer.
Going shopping with her was fun. I ended up buying more than she did, and when she did buy something, it was completely pointless: like a stuffed animal or something like that. I insisted that I bought her something girl-like, for example a necklace, for her birthday, which was on July 10th. For her birthday, I bought her a flat silver bracelet with her name engraved on the back with hearts. I hope she likes it and doesn’t think it’s tacky. We went to the Café every day, sometimes twice, and we made it a goal to try everything they make by the end of summer.
One day, we were thinking of something to do together and Macie wanted to make a scrapbook. She said she wanted something to remember me and this summer by. We walked to a nearby store together and held hands the entire way there. We bought a brown book and she drew a black heart on the cover. It was filled with blank pages, and she said that we could up all our adventures in here. We also bought a blue polaroid camera. Immediately after we bought the camera, we went outside and took a bunch of pictures. After a little while, we wanted coffee. Instead of getting the usual to-go, cardboard cups, we sat inside and got our coffee in white porcelain ones. She told me that I have pretty hands and I told her that she has a pretty face and she smiled and blushed. She took my hands in hers and held them up close so she could admire them better. She ran her finger over the cross tattoo on the back of my hand, below my thumb. She told me that her parents wanted her to be a Catholic but she preferred Atheism. She told me that she doesn’t care what religion I am and she loves me unconditionally which made me feel relieved. She also said that religion doesn’t make someone a good person, character does. And this is why I love that girl.
She found my pack of cigarettes and that hit her hard. She told me that her grandfather passed away from a heart attack before she was born and she would hate for that to happen to me. I told her that I pick her over the cancer sticks. I didn’t smoke for a long time after that, but I never relinquished it fully. There’s still so much more to happen.
We printed the pictures out and stuck them on the first blank page. We took little kissing breaks in between our scrapbooking, and those were nice.
“We should sign our names on the cover.” And we did.
