"Ok babe. See you in two weeks." I kissed JJ one last time before he hopped into the car with the rest of the Sidemen. They were off doing some secret project stuff, I never question their adventures. My phone buzzed as I waved away the taxi.
Future Mrs Airey: F - Bridesmaid Dresses ordered should be coming in a couple weeks xx B - Coolio, ordered to my flat yeah? Xx F - Yeah because I'll be with family for a bit xx B - Cool cool xx F - Thanks Bee x B - Ya welcome x
I switched off my phone and put it in my pocket. I hopped into the elevator and made my way to my flat. Ok so I still don't have a new roomie but JJ practically lives here so it doesn't even matter. Also because it probably matters we chose the first dress:
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All of us got together and had a vote. Because we are diplomatic as fuck. I made my way into the weirdly empty and quiet flat. When you're used to living with JJ it seems deadly silent while he's gone. I got in and changed into my sweats. I was in a pretty decent outfit because me and JJ had just been to the shops but now I was at home so it doesn't matter. I changed into my Sidemen sweats and started watching Rick and Morty. I was almost at the end of the show so that's sad I guess. I haven't felt sad in forever. With JJ it's like a Disney film, well a Disney film was a lot of sex in it. Ok maybe not a Disney film but you get my point, it's brilliant. We've fallen super head over heels in 6 months and a part of me is terrified. Couples like that are either the best or have a super messy end. I don't want it to end. Then my phone buzzed pulling me out of my thoughts.
Cute fuqboi: C - Just heading into the airport, I'll text you as soon as I get to Spain xx B - Don't worry about texting me, have fun and relax x You deserve it baby xx C - You're the best xx B - I know ;) x
I put down the phone and sunk further into the sofa. I really want him to text me ASAP but I'm not asking him to do that. He needs to have fun. We need space and time apart. It's for the best. We'll be fine. He'll be fine.
•••
The bed is so cold. And this is why I can't do breakups. Everything everywhere reminds me of him. If he had left me I'd be a mess right now. But I'm happy because he's living his life and having fun. Not too much fun hopefully, if you know what I mean. Joking. JJ wouldn't do that to me. Probably. I wrapped myself in the duvet and scrolled through my Instagram for a bit before getting bored. And then eventually falling asleep, god I didn't realise how tired I am.
•••
I woke up and checked my phone. Wow this is weird, there's a lot of tags and texts. I will reply to the texts later for now, why the hell am I being tagged in so much stuff. Oh. Oh no. No no no. This is a dream! It has to be! A nightmare. No please no. A choked cry came out but mainly silent sobbing as scrolled through the photos upon photos of JJ and a girl last night. Drama alert was talking about me and JJ, and this mystery bitch. I stared tears staining my cheeks at the photo of JJ kissing this girl. It was JJ for sure. As for the girl, it's not like I care. Then I looked through my texts.
Future Mrs Airey: F - Babe I saw the drama alert stuff. I'm coming over and bringing the girls :( x Love you Bethany xx B - Please don't.
Simon Minter: S - I'm sorry S - He was really drunk Bee S - He's honestly so sorry S - Please talk to him B - Don't even try it.
Cute fuqboi:
Actually before reading that text I need to change something.
Cunt: C - Babe please xx C - Listen to me, it was an honest mistake xx C - Bumble Bee don't listen to media and shit they'll try and blow it outta proportion xx C - It was a drunken mistake, I'm sorry xx B - Don't call me Bee or anything for that matter. Just fuck off. I was right about you. Fuqboi.
I threw my phone across the room and pulled myself into a ball. He is gone for one fucking day and he just can't help himself can he. One day. What did I do wrong? Am I not enough? Why am I not enough? I heard the knock at my door but ignored it. I don't want the girls. I don't want anyone. I want to be left alone. I thought I should send a public message just in case fans were thinking this was fake or some stupid shit.
@Bethany.IX : Fake cunt. Done with this bullshit. Fuck feelings.
And tweet. God I love stirring the pot. Adding to drama is nice. It'll be good for his ego to get taken down a few by all of this. He needs to rethink his life. What. A. Cunt. For once I let myself cry. It was a weird feeling crying as loud and as much as you need. My throat was sore and my face was wet but there is something about letting yourself cry that... helps. My heart aches. Why? Why would he do this?
