we were so close, we were so great together, are eyes met and butterflies grew in our bellies as smiles grew on our faces, you would sit and stare at me, you would make me feel like no other and support me when i fell. you took away all my false hope and replaced it with love and trust, you were my light in the dark times i was facing. every time i saw you a kind of excitement appeared out of the blue, you made me laugh even when i had no reason to.
you would make sure i was okay, and let me lie on your shoulder when i got tired, you wouldn't mind if my legs were tired and i put them on top of yours or when i would keep you up at night so i had someone to talk to. you didn't care when i would get annoyed with you most of the time you brushed it off and made me fall right back in love with you, you would make me blush and not compare myself to other girls. you where perfect or rather we and when i was almost banned from seeing you, you sat up most of the night reasuring me everything was going to be ok.
you did all you could to make sure we could still be together without are parents suspecting anything, it was dangerous but it was worth it, itrusted you with so many secrects and i loved you fully, you trusted me too and that's why we were great. you kissed me like no other, you made is special, you made it mean something other than a kiss. i listened to you when i wouldn't listen to myself, i let you in.
our hugs were the warmest and our love was so true, i'd never felt this before, it felt infinative, but most things end with a bang and i knew one day our parents would figure it out but until then i hoped we would carry on, i hoped we'd let them wonder until they could prove us guity...
but we stopped messaging on facebook just like that, his great-granny had died but he was ok i think, he was fine that night but the next day he didn't see me or talk to me and the next, until, he told his brother (my best friend) for me to stop coming over, i took this in a whole different way, asked him to talk to me and he refused, i felt upset. he continued to ignore me and his brother messaged me saying he had been showing his parents the messages i had sent. his dad messaged me....
he said for me to stay away for a while and to stop talking to his son or he would be contacting my father, he then said that his son didn't have feelings for me and i did so to leave him be, i asked his son this and he said this was lies, by this point i was confused and askd what had happened he said i was told to stay away so i replied i just needed to say goodbye.
i had taken this too hard, he was my everything and i'm just meant to let that slide, he meant so much to me and it hurts to see he wasn't feeling the same, 4 days ago he said he loved me in person while kissing me on the stairs, the first time he'd said it in person, i wonder how long he has felt like this, i wonder if those 3 vital words were lies.
i have on and off cried these passing days, life without his presence as more than a friends kills me inside because i know i need him beside me to carry on. and i also know he doesn't need me...
i love him, i love the way he makes me smile and gives me intense butterflies, i love evrything about him, i just wish he knew and felt the exact same, i just wish he would understand and at least give me an explaination...
