Hiraeth Of The Heart (Tweek X Craig)

Chapter 8, Unregretted Mistakes

       

A flow of blood traveled to the most evident part of my face as I was at a loss for words.

"I... I didn't summon you!!" I squealed in protest while glancing my eyes away from his boner sticking right in my line of sight. I let Craig know with my facial expression - that was pointing towards an empty brown wall - that I was offended he would accuse me of such a wrong-doing. With a nervous twitch here and there, I stood to my feet; leaving the inside of between Craig's legs to be an empty space of my old green shag carpet.

"Look Tweek, there is no other possible explanation. I showed up out of nowhere, no memory of how I ended up like this, and the only hint I've got as to what I am... is you." Craig's gaze softened as he spoke the last word. After a trivial moment of silence beats around in the air, he continued.

"Won't you just consider the fact that maybe, just maybe, you're involved in this screwed-up situation for a reason?"

"I don't even know how to summon an incubus; how can you expect someone with no earthly clue on how it works to be able to accomplish that? It doesn't make sense, Craig!"

Craig put a finger to his temple and rubbed. "Can't you just, you know, look up how other people summoned them and then double check your happening that day?"

"Fine."  I furrowed my brows and began my stare-down with the carpet in defeat. Craig steadily stood to his feet, leaving his defeated blue hat on the battlefield, and walked over to my shaking figure. It was around four-thirty in the morning. The lack of sleep was really getting to me. I almost thought the blaring moonlight from my open window shining against Craig's soft skin, his raven black hair almost glowing with an unsaturated blue tint, was appealing to look at; My heart jumping rope in my chest the closer he came.

As he reached his destination to the spot in front of the tips of my toes, he elevated his hand and let it rest upon my head. I flinched. If this was a reality show, I'm sure the cameraman would be shoving his high definition camera lens into my face. Thank god I'm not reality-tv worthy. Just imagining every little expression I had ever let wash over my face being filmed for the whole man-eating world to see is way too much pressure for me. Craig reluctantly lifted his hand from my blonde, out of control hair and placed it in his pocket with ease.

His face painting a blurred picture as a summary of how he felt. It was unclear. He sauntered past me with those blue, clouded, heart swallowing eyes of his and plopped himself onto my creaky bed. Taking his time to scoot to the area where the bed collides with the wall; never letting his fingers depart from his pockets. I knew that feeling. I related to those hands of his that craved to be embraced so very much. Although they are for many different reasons, I'm sure of it. I swallowed loudly. Did he hear that? All of Colorado heard it, I'm sure of it.

I slid down into the floor that I had just previously managed to drag my exhausted body up from. Defeated again, by the Craig Tucker. As I now rested my tense back against the side of my bed, I pulled my phone out and typed in my lengthy password quickly, as I was already accustomed to doing so daily. My phone, like most teenagers my age, was as vital to me as the blood in my body. Although I could live without the constant red tint to my face when Craig set off the bomb in my chest.

I was more willing to swallow a stick of dynamite or frolic in a field of landmines then face that guy when he's in one of his 'immodest neck sucking' moods. Which is kind of a big deal for someone who wouldn't watch Lord of the Rings because it was 'scary'. My heart would probably more likely survive the dynamite swallowing thing than Craig.

I stopped my screen scrolling once I had found a decently professional seeming article; casting my eyes over the page in search for 'ways to summon Incubi' as I had been told to do so. Not once in my life did I imagine that my freshman year of high school wouldn't consist of studying, after-school clubs, or finding a girlfriend (Who I wouldn't find regardless). No. It's quite unique compared to how I imagined it to be. Searching the internet for ways to summon a sex-demon isn't exactly an anticipated action of an anxiety-filled boy in ninth grade. Any sane person to see my search history would call the psychiatric hospital to schedule an immediate appointment. My eyes stopped scrolling. I found it: How to summon an incubus.

"Craig! I found it!" I declared as I held up my phone in my shaking hands.

"Come here. I want to read it too." Craig patted the spot beside the bed.  I lifted my leg onto the bed, my knees supporting my weight as I crawled over to the spot next to Craig and was slightly hesitant to take my reserved seat next to him. Once the shuffling of covers departed the otherwise silent room, I looked up to Craig to see him staring at me.  I glanced up to his head of black hair that unevenly covered different parts of his forehead. "Don't you want your hat?"

Craig lifted his hand to his hair and pushed it back, letting it flow through his fingers like a gentle wave of water. "I'll get it later." He puffed out the sentence as if it was all one word, letting it leave his mouth like a cloud of smoke.

"Well, first it says u-um- write a letter to... Lilith. . Who's Lilith?" I glanced at Craig, furrowing my brows and biting my lip. He shrugged in response with his usual dead expression and a typhoon of emotion in his ocean eyes. After whirling my face back around to face the phone I held in front of me, I could feel a hole drilling into the side of my head from his staring eyes. I ignored it and continued reading. "Describe your desired person in the letter, add a drop of your blood and burn the letter to finalize the request. They will be brought to you as a succubus or incubus soon after.  I didn't write a letter to a Lilith, I only wrote...- Oh, Jesus!" I screamed, pulling and tugging at my hair in realization.

"Tweek calm down, what's wrong?" Craig said with a hint of concern hiding behind his nasal voice. I couldn't believe myself. I really screwed up bad. Words poured out of my mouth at the speed of light as I twitched and shivered. "W-Well... after bumping into you two days ago I got really curious about you, and I thought maybe we could be friends, but then I decided it probably wouldn't work. I walked into school the next day and Cartman told me what had happened. I felt really guilty for not stopping you from leaving that day and I decided I would- "

I hesitated. Anxiety stood at my doorstep, per usual. After a small pause, I gulped followed by me heaving in a gallon of air in preparation to explain further.

"IWROTEALETTERFORYOUAND
IGOTAPAPERCUTANFTHEREWAS
BLOODONITANDACANDLEFELL
ANDTHENOTECAUGHTONFIREAND
TOKENWASYELLINGAND- "

"I think I'm caught up now." Craig sighed out and shut his eyes, facepalming. "So that explains the things going on in my lower region."

I blushed, but it was soon overtaken by a forlorn look directed towards Craig. Subsequently, he lifted his hand from his eyes and opened them back up to the world again. He revealed the emotion he had hid under his fingers.

The ocean calms me...

His eyes calm me.

"I'm sorry." I huffed out a hurdle of regret. "Why?"

I threw him a questioning look. A photo finish that you'd only see on those oh-so-awful stock-photos. Tilted head and all. Craig gave a sad smile. I loved that. Sad, happy, it was still his smile. It deserved its own billboard. Actually- I take that back, the world is not ready for such a thing as Craig Tucker's smile. No one is. I wasn't. It hurt my heart; It was a bullet going straight through and leaving a little Craig-shaped hole.

"Tweek, it's not ideal being a demon and all; having the thoughts about you that I have. Though I think with you... that's where I'll have the most fun."

There it was again. I should have swallowed the dynamite.

My heart... might be shaking more than my hands.

It's never done that before.