Anxiety

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 I have an anxiety problem. There, I said it.

Sometimes it gets so bad that I start to hallucinate things and I'm in another world. So, I take pills. I never get to experience the thrill of taking risks and being a pre-teen, so I believe that's why my issue isn't getting better. I want to be like other kids. I want to participate in activities without me having a panic attack and leaving. I want to properly deliver speeches in class. I want to speak with people. I want to have friends. But I will never be able to achieve that.

My avoidance of taking risks comes from my parents. I grew up with them telling me every single thing I have to do, to the point where I feel like I can't even control my own mind. I'm basically a robot. My anxiety started because of my parents. Without their constant demands, I don't know what to do, which causes my anxiety to rise and having me break out in panic attacks. They don't do the same with my siblings. Because I don't have any.

Don't get me wrong, my parents are caring. Very caring. They check on me to see if everything's okay mentally and physically. It's a main reason why they tell me what to do.. I'm their only child, and they want to protect me at all costs. I love them to the bottom of my heart, but honestly, they're overdoing it. 

They noticed my.. condition.. and pondered over it for a while. My dad decided to cut down on the commands. But my mom had a much larger idea. She decided to get me a sister. 

An adopted sister by the name of Maira.

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