Fake friends

My life so far

   Hi, hello, I'm Xyler Nova (pronounced Zyler).Yeah stupid name right, thanks mom. *mom yells* "YOU WELCOME!" I'm 14 and I go to an average school with the average annoying kids. I hate it there, people are so annoying.
   Anyway, to get personal, I have social anxiety and I hate talking to people. The only person who really understands me and I enjoy talking to...is my older brother Jacob. He's 16 and he acts like he knows everything, but to me he does. He helps me get through everything. He comforts me when I feel like crap. He is awesome, and he is my everything.
    My mom is okay. She is like any other single mom who's husband left her because he cheated on her. But we don't associate with piles of trash now do we?  Didn't think so... we're fine together at home. Just the three of us, OH and can't forget our family doggo Narci (pronounced Nar-ki). She's a big ol huski who is basically a living teddy bear.
   Aaaahhhhh, social anxiety. People say that I'm just shy, not the case what so ever. I just don't like talking to people. I don't need them, I've got my family. Friends are useless, as my mom used to say "friends will take you far, but won't carry you back". And she was right. I've tried to make friends when I was young and innocent. Living without a care in the world.
    Until my heart was shattered and put into a box with a padlock on it when my so called "best friends" betrayed me. They were my everything, I couldn't be without them, or so I thought. Karen, Lila (pronounced Lie-la, just like she did to me heh) and Christen. We stuck together for 4 years since kindergarten all the way until 4th grade. When people made fun of you if you are different.
    A boy named Charlie came to our class from another school and he thought he as Mr. Big Shot. He thought he was the shit. My three best friends, my three only friends started hanging out with him. And when they were talking during class I heard my name come up in  conversation between Lila and Charlie. She said "oh yeah and I have another person I want you to meet to" I didn't mind that because at that time I was open to anything. "Oh cool who is it??" I was startled he wanted to know who I was since he never even said hi to me once.
   "Uh it's my friend Xyler." He looked confused for a second and said "is it a boy?" She looked at him as he started giggling. "Uhm no it's a girl" He busted out laughing during recess. "AHAH WHAT KIND OF NAME IS XYLER, ITS A BOYS NAME TOO AHAH!!" All I could do is stand there and listen. My body was frozen. I never thought of my name like that.
   Lila looked around and said "I know right it's stupid, I don't even know why I decided to be her friend she even looks like a boy." And she started laughing too. At this point I was on my knees, crying and shaking. I thought she was the good one. Karen and Christen were good friends but Lila, I wouldn't have expected her to do me like this.
   A staff the was watching the kids rounded the corner and saw me sitting there shaking and crying. I was in shock, I didn't move, I couldn't. The staff picked me up and took me to the nurses office where they called my parents and said that I should be taken home.
    The day after I went up to Karen, Christen, and Lila to try to go to hang out with them before class and then Karen said "oh we don't talk to girls with boy names" then I looked at Christen and she said agreeing "yeah what are you a boy or something, yuk."
    I looked at all three of them. Lila was looking down and I yelled "WHAT THE HELL I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE MY FRIENDS?!"
   "Well I guess you thought wrong" said Lila.
   They all walked away and I stood there in the corridor watching them leave. My heart which was once full and loving was now cold and unforgiving. I picked up my bag which had fell on the floor while I was crying, and I ran away. I ran out of the corridor that lead to the school and I ran back home.
    I opened the door to my house, standing there, shaking, unable to move. My mom ran to me and kept asking why I was crying, why was I home and not at school. "I-I-I-I'm sorry mom." And I ran up to my room and locked myself inside.
   After a day of crying I felt like I had no one. I knew I always had my mom, and my brother, but what about my school life?
  "Im done with friends, I don't need them anyway. They are just dead weight." And when I arrived at schools the next day I saw them sitting and I chuckled and walked past. I stayed to myself ever since then.
  I'm a happy and outgoing person (quite loud says my brother) at home and I at school I just do what I have to do to get my ass out of there and the end of the day. And I'm happy like that.