LOVE NOTES [Complete]

TERRIFIED

A/N: Para sa lahat ng umaasa sa #KyRu keep fighting!

Kylie POV:

          I felt warm when I woke up.

          The heat emanating from Ruru was both comforting and unsettling. I could feel his legs entwined with mine, his bare chest pressed against my back. I had given in to him again, kahit na pinangako ko sa sarili ko at kay Ruru na hindi na ulit mangyayari iyon, after the last time.

          But I had relented. Alam kong pag-gising ni Ruru ay sasabihin ko na naman na di na ulit namin gagawin toh kagaya ng lagi kong ginagawa. But as certain as I was that I would tell him this, I was also certain that I would lie in his bed with him until he woke up. Like I always did.

          I used to do relentless mental gymnastics with myself when I had woken up after the first few times we had started sleeping with each other. Leave before he wakes up, I would think. My mind would be screaming at me, but my body was comforted by the heat of his body. The two halves of me would never cooperate so I had shortly given up on mentally exhausting myself with reason. Our relationship was carnal. Pagdating sa kanya lagi kong mas pinkikinggan ang sinasabi ng katawan ko kesa ng isip ko.

         Surprisingly, Ruru had wanted more. He wanted a real relationship with me. A functioning one. One that wasn't based solely on sex and physical attraction. Tumanggi ako. Ruru was everything that I wasn't used to.

        Ruru was so different from any other guy I knew. He was bold, forward. He didn't beat around the bush; Alam niya kung anong gusto niya sa buhay niya at kung paano nya makukuha iyon. He had decided he had wanted me. And he had got me.

         Una kong nakita si Ruru ng makasabay ko sya sa campus shuttle bus. I had been studying for a midterm in the library and had decided to leave early since I had discovered I had left my laptop charger back at my apartment. Puno na ang bus kaya wala na akong nagawa kundi ang tumayo something na ayokong ginagawa dahil pakiramdam ko lagi akong matutumba.

       Bago umalis ang bus ay sumakay si Ruru at tumayo sa unahan. He obviously knew people on the bus and I watched as he waved to a group of boys who loudly greeted him from the back of the bus. He flashed them a charming grin, pero wala namang sinabi sa mga ito. Huminga ako ng malalim saka ako tumingin sa labas ng bintana, watching the bright car headlights pass, praying to God that I didn't fall kapag lumiko na ang bus sa intersection.

           And when I looked back up towards the front, my heart sped up when I noticed his dark eyes on me.
        That was when it all started. I remember thinking I could become addicted to his eyes. I remember thinking they were warm.

        Hindi ako katulad ng iba na nagba-blush kapag tinitingnan....come to think of it bakit naman ako magba-blush? I had returned his stare until he smiled a small smile in amusement. Then something overcame me and I dropped my eyes down his body boldly. His tight shirt emphasized the bulging muscles. He obviously spent time at the gym. A lot of time.

         I watched as the muscles in his arm tensed, moving under his tanned skin, as the bus switched lanes. Humawak siya ng mahigpit sa barandilya ng bus and that alone sent something to me. I had never reacted so strongly to a male presence. I would appreciate men from afar, at a safe distance, but never had my body burned with an intense desire.

        Ruru had the ability to do that to me. It was his body, I argued. Not his kind eyes. Lumapit sya sa akin pagkatapos bumaba ng mga estudyante na bumati dito kanina.

         "Like what you see?" tanong niya sa akin, flashing that charming grin. Di ko alam ang sasabihin ko. I hadn't expected him to approach me. Nagulat ako....ginulat nya ako.