The name of my best friend is changed for her privacy
Dear World,
I am a regular teenager, I go to school, I read books, I love sports, I play an instrument(Violin), but there is one thing that makes me stand out.
Background:In July of 2015 I spent the night at my then best friend's house. When it was time to go to bed we tried to sleep on the bed but that didn't work out so we decided to sleep on the floor.
After about 15 minutes I turned over to see if she was still awake. When I rolled over I realized that she was staring at me.
We stared at each other for a good 20 minutes and then she said. "Can you keep a secret?"
And I said. "Obviously, who would I tell. Your the only one who I would normally tell." And I kinda chuckled after I said that and then she leaned over to my ear and whispered "I...I think that I like you."
It took me a minute before I could comprehend what she had said. "What..." I said but before I could finish my sentence she leaned in and kissed me.
I didn't realize what was happening at first but soon we were both kissing each other but it abruptly stopped when we heard her Mom walk out of her room and come into Sara's room.
"Why are you guys still up? It's 12:30 go to bed." She said. "Ok Mom we are going to go to bed. We'll see you in the morning." Sara said, her Mom smiled and shut the door.
I turned back over and we just stared at each other. "What do we do now?" I asked. "I'm not sure but that can't happen again. Mom was way to close to catching us." Sara responded and I nodded.
"Do you want to cuddle?" I asked her and she nodded and I got up and laid behind her and we fell asleep just like that.
I couldn't get what had happened out of my head for weeks but it seamed like Sara had completely forgotten what had happened.
I was completely wrong she didn't forget she was just keeping it bottled up inside herself.
Until one day she told somebody. I felt so betrayed that as soon as the conversation with the adult was over I ran out crying.
I couldn't believe that she had told someone what happened between us. I thought that we agreed to not talk about what happened.
We ended up not talking for almost 5 months. When we did talk it was honestly the hardest thing that I remember having to do. When we became friends again it was hard but we persevered.
Sara ended up moving away after 5th grade and I cried and cried for almost 2 weeks. I then realized that I loved her in a different way than I had ever loved someone before.
So if your reading this "Sara" just know that I tried so hard not to let it happen but it did. Please get ahold of me.
Update: "Sara" and I started talking again a little over a month ago but things have changed now and I have a boyfriend. I still love her but we can't be together because. We're trying to make things work as friends but the bond just isn't there anymore.
Love,@MackenzieSpeck
