Time after time

Chapter 4

"Perché c'è un casino," My grandma shouts when she walks into my mothers room. (Why is there a mess?!) I was laying in bed, holding one of the diaries I found in the back of moms closet, the pictures a still cut up on the floor. "I'm sorry gramma. Lo pulirò ." (I'll clean it up.) I get off the bed and start sweeping up the crumpled memories.

I feel my grandma's hand rubbing my back a few seconds later. It was then I realized that I was crying. "Shh. Va bene, il mio amore, la tua cassaforte," she comforts. (It's fine, my love, your safe.) I curl into ball, crying into my grandma's lap.

She was gone, my mom and my sister were gone. I don't want it to be true but it is. The one who taught me Italian, who taught me to paint, my mother- my best friend. And my sister who shared my love of art and food. My dad who is held responsible for their deaths, and the one who continuously tries getting in touch with me after I told him I never want to see him again.

"Is everything alright my bellezze," grandpa asks when he walks by my open door. (Beauties.) Grandma slowly gets up and goes to tell him what is going on. I stay on the floor staring at a picture of my mom and him at the hospital with me.

All of these pictures in her box's are with him. There isn't a single memory before he came and ruined her life. "Piccolo amore, sei a posto." (Little love, you're okay.) "There's nothing with just momma," I point to the pictures. Grandma sits on my bed and gestures for me to sit next to her. I do  just that and let her hold me. "They were in love. You're momma lo adoravo, tutto era su di lui." (Adored him, everything was about him.) the way she switched to Italian and English was relaxing. It was just what mom used to do. She knew English, much more than my grandparents but she refused to finish a full sentence in English unless we were ordering something. It helped my sister and I learn while we were growing up.
I miss them so much. Everything was taken from me because of him. A person supposed to protect me hurt me more than anyone else could. "Umm sorry to interrupt but is there anything you need," Henry asked. "No." My grandpa got up and at my door the two of them started talking in hushed voices.
    "Madyson. Do you wanna hang out with a couple of my friends and I tonight?" I gave him a puzzled look and discretely he pointed to my grandpa. He told him to invite me. Even knowing it was a forced invite I still wiped my tears and nodded. "If you don't mind."
    "Okay well I'm leaving in ten minutes." With that he walked to his room and I got up. "niente affari divertenti," My grandpa shouted after Henry. (No funny business).
    "Well darling, vai a prepararti." My grandma gets up and leaves my room. (Go get ready).