Wisteria

Chapter 6

He wanted to cringe and turn away. Every time he saw his younger brother, a tidal wave of guilt threatened to drown him. It was painful, agonizing to the very core, and he should never be forgiven – and yet the younger brother kept smiling.

Why was he smiling?

Madara looked down at Izuna, who was sitting outside against a tree, hiding in the shadow it provided from the almost scorching sun. As he approached, Izuna turned his face in his general direction, his arms crossed over his newly bandaged chest as he seemed to be simply relaxing and enjoying the quiet for once. He couldn't see, of course. A white blindfold covered his eyes, and Madara nearly wanted to tear his gaze away from his face and look away all together. He had nightmares because of what he'd done, and it was always in the back of his mind, eating away at him slowly but surely.

"You're back." Izuna greeted him with a smile.

'Stop smiling. There's nothing to smile about.' Madara thought and wanted to snap at him, but managed to keep his cool and remained silent as he stared down at his younger brother's form.

"How did you know it was me?" he questioned instead, a mild frown on his face.

"The rhythm in your pace." Izuna responded pleasantly. "That, and you're the only one who approaches me without being vocal." There was another silence. "Come sit down for a while. You work too much." The younger patted the spot next to him. Madara almost wanted to shake his head out of habit, but then voiced his decision.

"I'm fine with standing."

"Why? So you can look down at me in pity and beat yourself up over it some more?" Izuna suddenly said rather harshly, turning his head back down, lowered as he faced his brother's knees. "I can hear it in your voice." Izuna added softly. Madara's scowl deepened. He opened his mouth, but he didn't know what to say. For once, he was speechless. He sighed and closed his mouth again before he started looking like a gaping fish. "It was my offer to make and you accepted it. At least, that's what I thought. Instead you've been practically avoiding me ever since then." Just a few months.

That was much too short a time to start talking about this.

"I'm not avoiding you." Madara almost snapped at him in his own defense. "If I wanted to avoid you, you wouldn't have heard from me, not even once."

"You know that's not what I meant." Izuna said with a sigh, a hint of melancholy in his voice. "You've been so distant lately. It's almost like we're growing apart." Madara's eyes widened slightly, another pang of guilt shooting through his chest.

But how could he not be distant? He'd been irredeemably selfish, sacrificing his own brother just so he could have it better. So maybe you could argue he'd been desperate and frightened by the darkness and he would've done anything to get his sight back at that point, maybe you could argue it was for the sake of the clan – but that did not justify it in the least. He'd practically given a death sentence to the person he cared about the most in this world and had vowed to protect. How could you just get over something like that? Older brothers were supposed to look after their younger siblings, not the other way around.

Now, looking at Izuna who was getting more and more injuries with every battle he insisted on having despite his handicap, it was only a matter of time before –

Madara felt a stinging pain in his palms, and vaguely realized he'd dug his nails into them.

He would never forgive himself for it. He didn't want to be forgiven for it either.

"I don't want to talk about this right now." Madara decided with a growl, and turned around, about to walk away when Izuna grabbed his arm and prevented him from leaving.