All His Attention

Chapter One

Hey everyone! I really hope you enjoy this story! It's your typical bad boy story, but this definitely has a lot more shit than the usual ones. I'm also already going to say TRIGGER WARNING now. This story contains thoughts and acts of depression, suicide, self-harm, and also contains scenes of rape and sexual assault. While I don't go into detail on these scenes, I'm just giving you a warning. I would also like to add that you can talk to me at any time if you're struggling with anything! Thank you for reading!

Chapter One

My heart pounded in my chest while my head spun. My throat tightened along with my chest, restricting my airflow. I couldn't move, couldn't breathe as I watched the love of my life across the cafeteria from me. Well, ex-love of my life. He had dumped me over some girl he had just met and I hadn't seen or talked to him since then. I was able to go without interacting with him while school was out for summer break, but it was the first week back at school. I had somehow managed to avoid him until now, but my victory came to an end. I thought I was prepared, I thought I was over him but I clearly wasn't. The way he smiled still caused my heart to flutter and I yearned to be back in his arms. His blue t-shirt hugged his chest and arms, arms that used to hold me. Instead those arms were wrapped around another girl's waist. It wasn't the girl he broke up with me for and I could already tell it wouldn't last long. He totally ignored her while he talked to his friends. She tried desperately to get his attention but he shrugged her off like she was nothing. You could see the frustrated look in her eyes as she let out a loud sighed and rolled her eyes, turning her attention to her smart phone.

"Are you going to stare at him all day?"

I turned to see my best friend, Michael, now by my side. His jaw was clenched as he stared at my ex-boyfriend. Anger flared in his brown eyes and he ran a hand through his short, chestnut hair. He sported some peach fuzz around his mouth, showing me that he was in a hurry this morning and didn't have time to shave. He wore the same dress blue uniform I was wearing for ROTC, a class we both had that day. My ex didn't wear his uniform, meaning my suspicion was confirmed and he was no longer in ROTC. We had met in the high school military program where Jake was quick to steal my heart in just one smile. I was absolutely infatuated with him.

"I was hoping he'd fallen off the face of the earth by now," I muttered. Michael sent me a small smiling, knowing perfectly well what I meant. Michael knew everything about my relationship with Jake. Not only that, but I knew Michael was jealous since he had a crush on me. At times I thought I felt the same way, but I would always go back and forth on my feelings. I decided it was best to keep him in the friend zone as my best friend, nothing more.

The bell rang overhead, signaling that it was time to head to class. My eyes wondered back to Jake to see him turn towards me to leave the cafeteria. His eyes landed on me and his nose scrunched up in disgust. My throat tightened again as I tried to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over. He was disgusted by me. Shouldn't I be the one disgusted by him? He cheated and left me for a girl he just met. It was probably my fault he cheated, we were constantly fighting before he left me.

"Let's go," Michael lightly took ahold of my arm and dragged me out of the cafeteria. I let him lead me to the opposite end of the school and out the doors. Texas summer heat was quick to greet us, causing me to sweat a little in my dress blues. I clearly wore the wrong uniform, but dress blues looked better than the khaki uniform. Besides, I was an officer in ROTC so I had the right to wear the nicer uniform.

We made our way inside a smaller building and went into the first classroom. Students were already sitting down but we ignored them and headed into the conference room. Two freshman boys sat in the chairs around the conference table, both of them on their phones. Michael glanced back at me and I smirked, knowing Michael was giving me permission to yell at them.