(This is from Thor The Dark World, it would be funnier if you have already watched the movie.)
Rubble and dust churned through the morning air of Asgard. The screams and wails of citizens punctuated the adrenaline pumped atmosphere as they scrambled away from their fates of being flattened to a grease spot onto the gilded gold tiles.
The Dark Elves' air craft had just about destroyed every single looming column in the courtyard as it skid head first towards its target. You could say they pulled a Miley Cyrus and came in like a wrecking ball. Thank the gods the Kurse was not planning to lick Thor's hammer. Wait, the Kurse was gonna kill Frigga?! Okay... I prefer the first option...
/Anywayyyyy/, the air craft finally came to a stop in front of the Asgardian steps where a dozen or so fear stricken guards awaited to confront the invaders of their realm. Like seriously, there were only a dozen or so. Where the hell are the other guards? A giant freaking aircraft lands in the courtyard, one would expect many more to protect their realm. Here I give you Asgard's finest, ladies and gentlemen.
/Anywayyyy/, the guards clutched at their weapons with white knuckled grips. The entrance of the aircraft peeled open /slowly/ and /dramatically/.
The Dark Elves stepped out /sloooooowly/ and /dramaticallyyyyy/.
Malekith took a few more seconds looking sinisterly dramatic as he accessed the damaged done by his ship that he /obviously/ had not seen before even though he was in the freaking ship.
This entire time, the guards remained standing there in silence as they waited for the Dark Elves to finish their dramatic shots because even in war they are that polite. Or maybe it just never occurred to villians/heroes in any movie EVER to just attack the foe during their dramatic shots.
/ANYWAAAAAY/, Asgard's meagre defense charged against the Dark Elves. The forces collided in a flurry of glinting steel and snarls. All around the battle raged, explosions bringing fatality left and right.
Malekith towered over a trembling guard. Seized by his collar, the pathetic excuse of a warrior futilely struggled in Malekith's iron grasp. He looked his death straight in the eye and gathered up enough courage to ask the question that had plagued all of Asgard the moment their eyes had laid themselves upon Malekith.
"I-If you're a Dark Elf, why are you not black?" He stammered softly.
Without warning, all fighting ceased into a deathly silence as friend and foe united together in shared exasperation.
"OH MY ODIN, Richard!" one of the guards shrieked. Richard being the guard in question.
"You can't just ask Dark Elves why they're not black!"
