The Chosssen Une

Chapter One Preview, in Which the Young Protagonist Is Captured

        The legend of the Chosssen Une begins on a day exactly like any other day. A young girl sits on her bed, seeming to be doing nothing, as teenagers often seem to do. In fact, this girl, whose name is Anne, is thinking about life. Teenagers also do this very often.

Anyway, Anne was sitting on her bed thinking about life when she heard a crash. She begrudgingly rose from her spot, gazing longingly at the butt imprint on the blanket. Her cat would be shoved off it in a second. At least he would keep it relatively warm.

        Anne headed to the stairs, picking up a stray bat next to her brother’s bedroom door, and cautiously walked down to the landing. On the landing, an imp or goblin or…something lay, rubbing its rubbery, bald head. Anne likened it to a drawing of a pixie in a book on faeries she had read; small eyes, large head, small beer-gutted belly. In short, it was possibly one of the ugliest things Anne had seen in her, admittedly, short life. The creature looked up at her and was startled when it saw her face. It immediately jumped up, pointed at her, and screamed, “THE CHOSSSEN UNE IS HERE!” It grabbed Anne’s leg, snapped its oddly shaped fingers, and transported the two to a hall.

Not any hall, mind you. This was a grand hall, the kind you hear about in stories with kings and queens, faeries and elves, Norse and Greek gods. Anne thought it looked right out of  the second Thor movie.

        The creature, who was still clinging to Anne’s leg, pulled her towards a set of huge, gem-encrusted doors. Anne thought they looked gaudy, and probably fake. When Anne and the creature passed through the (probably fake) gem-encrusted doors, they saw a king and queen sitting on gem-encrusted thrones. Even the seats of the thrones were covered in cheap-looking crystals, which, Anne thought, was overkill.

Now, while Anne was sizing up her surroundings (tapestries with gold-colored thread, unicorn sculptures with “silver” horns, stone walls covered in white paint) the queen was chewing out the creature for bringing the Chosssen Une too quickly. The creature said something along the lines of “Well, we can’t do much about it now can we?” The queen replied to that with a swat to the creature’s head.

        “Excuse me, queenie?” Anne interjected, “Where am I, and when can I go? I was in the middle of thinking about life. And stuff.”

The queen, hearing our protagonist, whipped her head to face her. She instantly adopted a motherly attitude, with honeyed words and soft expressions.

        “Oh, don’t worry love, We’ll be getting you back home soon!”

Anne, who had read many books with evil queens who had attempted to kill the young protagonist , stared right into the queen’s face and whispered, “I don’t buy it.”

The queen looked at her with an expression most people save for when they step in a fresh pile of dog poo. However, this not-so-rare face was quickly replaced with the sugared one. The queen got up fr the ostentatiously decorated seat, crouched down so as to be eye-level with Anne, and smiled a smile of death.

        At least, that’s what it looked like to Anne. However, to anyone else who was not startled, irritated, and slightly peckish, it was a smile of that who felt they were talking to someone of a vastly lower intellect than them. Not evil, per se, but more neutral.