It Was Always There

She Will Not Break You

We sat at the small table in the kitchen and ate dinner. I would catch Harry every so often staring at me. What is with him tonight?

"So how was your engagement in Inverness?" I ask taking a sip of wine. Rosé wine really doesn't pair well with chicken marsala but its my favorite. Wait why did he go to the trouble of having Kensington's chef make my favorite meal? Why did he pair my favorite wine with a meal that it shouldn't be paired with?

"Good." His answer snaps me from my thoughts.

"They loved you." I reply.

"They seemed to love you more and you weren't even there." Harry's statement makes me chuckle.

"Just because of my family name. The Carlisle's have been a fixture in Inverness for centuries."

"No I think its more then that." I raise my eyebrows at Harry.

"Everyone knows everyone in Inverness." I say pushing my empty plate away. Mmmm that was good.

"It was like they wanted you on that engagement with me." His words hit something in me and I have to take a deep breath.

"Again only because I know practically everyone in town." Why is he pushing this?

"Speaking of knowing everyone. Mr. Harsher was there. Sends his love." Old little Mr. Harsher. I have known him my hole life. He owns the small bookstore that I love so much.

"How's he doing?" I ask realizing I haven't been there in a while.

"Good, gave me a stack of books for you. They are in my car." I nod. Bless Mr. Harsher. I notice Harry is done so I stand up and start to clear off the table. We clean up together and I notice that Harry is unusually quiet. I mean I am too but that's mainly because all I can think about is what happened the last time we did this. When we are done I follow Harry into the living room and see him grab his duffle and disappear down the hall to the guest room. He comes back a few minutes later in his pajamas. He has a couple DVD's in his hand. He's acting like now that he is engaged it's still okay for him to spend the night with his best friend.

"Do you really think it's a good idea for you to spend the night?" I ask as I watch him sit down in the sofa.

"Yeah why wouldn't? We have been doing this for years." He says laying the DVD boxes out on the coffee table.

"Now that you and Meghan are engaged I don't think it's appropriate." Harry sighs and runs his hand over his beard.

"I don't care about what's appropriate. Your my best friend Victoria. We have been through too much together. I will not stop hanging out with you, doing things with you that we have done for years, just because someone else thinks its inappropriate." Okay now I know something is wrong. Walking over I sit down next to Harry and take his hands in mine.

"Harry what's going on?" I ask. He sighs and leans back into the sofa.

"Nothing." Is his reply.

"Bullshit. Your forgetting who your talking to. I was there for the worst time of your life and the years after. I know when your hiding your feelings." The way he looks at me takes me back. I have seen that same look on the same face but it was a much younger twelve year old Harry. I reach forward and place my hand against his cheek.

"Love what has happened?" Harry takes my hand and places a kiss in my palm. The simple gesture sends my heart racing

"Meghan said no." My heart stops. His words sinking in making my blood race through my veins and my heart fills like its about to burst. Then I see the look on Harry's face. The look of a broken man. Rage then fills every fiber of my being. It must have shown on my face because Harry shakes his head no and holds my hand tighter.