Poems

15

I'm only 15. I shouldn't be scared about walking home at night, I shouldn't feel nervous about wearing a skirt that comes up above my knees, I shouldn't have to worry about being murdered because I didn't answer some guy who catcalled me. I'm only 15. I shouldn't be scared of my boyfriend who use to scream at me until his voice was raw and pound his fits into the wall next to me. "He doesn't hit me" that part it true. "He'd never hurt me" now there's the lie. I shouldn't cry at night because even though I said no he still touched me in places that shouldn't be touched. I'M ONLY FIFTEEN! He's 18, he's 21 and I'm lying to my parents about where I'm going because "if anybody knew we wouldn't be able to be together." I'm laying in his bed the place between my thighs aching, my wrists hurting. "It's only cause he needed it, right?" I didn't say no so it wasn't rape. Was it? I shouldn't be worried because my period is two weeks late. We broke up because I didn't want to suck him off. I might be pregnant with his baby. What would I tell my family? That their little girl might have a baby of her own? I'm still only 15. Ok good, my period was just late. Very late. The cramps are more painful then anything I'd ever experienced. I'm only 15. I shouldn't have to worry about anything. I should be having fun with my friends, not watching them ruin their lives with drugs. They shouldn't be having children but here we are. Kids having their own. We grew up too fast. Where is my childhood? When did it leave? I'm only 15.