Till The Very End

Everybody says that what happens in life is for a reason. Celebrate the good and cry over the bad. I use to just celebrate the good until the accident happened, an accident that tore me apart.

"Hun, its for the best you know that right?" my mother asks me looking through the mirror. I don't answer her... I don't wanna answer her so I just look outside the window at the fall orange and pink trees. I put my long brown messy hair into a bun so I don't look like a freak when the people next door stare at us.

"LILAH! put your sleeves down. Do you want to make a bad impression on us at the first day." I do what I'm told and pull my jean jacket sleeves down to hide the pain. The pain I did to myself almost everyday. I try to stop myself but I can't stop thinking back to that one night. Nobody understands me or the pain. All you do is get judged in this world we live in.

"I'm sorry mom. Won't happen again, so are we almost their at the new house" I hope so because I hate sitting in this stupid car for 4 hours. She points to a house that looks better then the house we did live in. It was a two story house with bright red bricks and a big white door.

"MOM! Its beautiful!" I hug her tight and give her a big kiss on the cheek while she gives me one back. I grab some of my stuff and rush inside. I hear the moving truck come and they start unloading all our stuff into the house.

"Hey! be careful with that its been in my family for years!" I hear my mother call to one of the workers while I just play with my hands. We packed everything so all I had to wear was an old dress of mine it was black with a floral pattern on it. I then  look at the neighbors house which looked the same as ours. Most of the houses did in this little town.

"Hi, I'm Sarah" some girl looking around my age pokes me on the shoulder " we are your neighbors umm... here we baked you brownies" she hands me a great smelling tray.

"thanks, I'm Lilah by the way." she tells me that I have a beautiful name and I try not to laugh at that joke. All I know is that I have to make friends here so keep on the fake smile and think happy thoughts. happy thoughts ... happy thoughts ... ha-

"Anyways it was nice meeting you Lilah. I have to go eat now so we will finish this conversation later" I nod and we both give each other friendly smiles with a wave goodbye.

After all our stuff is inside and the moving truck leaves we start making ourselves at home.

"I see you made a new friend already. Told you this would be good for us" she gives me a wink as we move the couch to the new living room.

"mom, we need to repaint the rooms" we giggle at the room color and both agree.

                               ~~~ 

I'm surrounded with my friends in our blue car with my favorite song. We are all laughing and shouting the lyrics to the song. I DON'T CARE I LOVE IT! I CRASHED MY CAR ...

"OMG MATT!!! WATCH OUT!" that's all I say, its all I can say when headlights come towards our car. Then its pitch black. I can't see anything. Come on open your eyes ... open them Lilah! My eyes finally open thank god I'm not dead! I crawl out the window that is smashed giving me cuts all over my body.

"Matt? Lindsey?? Genna?? GUYS???" I finally see people on the ground covered in blood. running over to them I think about the idiot that drove into us. Where the fuck is he?? As soon as I'm at my friends I drop down on my swollen cut  knees trying to wake them up. Come on wake up ... please guys wake up. But they never do... I look around for help but nobody stops on the highway not even one person. I go to the other car that is smashed to pieces wondering if I'm the only one who made if alive.

"Hello?? Anyone alive?" I open the door to see that I know these people. Tears flood my eyes.

"Dad?? Angela?? Omg please wake up ... please I don't wanna be alone here. Please... p-please.

I wake up with tears still filling my eyes. Why do I keep dreaming of that night. can't that memory leave me alone already?

"Lilah? hunny?" my mother barges into the room knowing that I just had the dream again. She hugs me tight rocking me back and forth saying that everything will be alright. When I know it wont.