I reach out to a long-legged, creature, wanting to poke the tip of its nose. My own legs struggle to come closer to it. I feel like I'm in space that I'm able to see my hair float by itself. Everything is so mute.
It was after a moment I realize that I seem to be underwater.
I ask myself for so many times about how could I even breathe. Do I need air or fish gills to survive? Why can't I hear the sound of the water?
In the end, it did not matter to me. My only interest at the moment is to see that thing up close.
As I swim closer, I note by note hear everything again: my mom's voice, the engine of the moving car, and finally, the sharp, sudden sound of my two, little hands clasped together. I look at my hand and there I see a small smudge of red, tracing until the edge my palm, and there I face a dead...
"Mosquito?" Mosquito.
My mom and I always say things in unison. She always knew about what is happening to me. She is a mind reader perhaps.
But she was not able to be the first time when she looked at the man who told her something. I can not remember what he told but I remember how my mom looked at the man and then at me. One worry, then shifted to a soft, gentle gaze.
"You can do it."
Mom transferred me to another home but it looked too plain and gloomy with the color of the curtains. I did not like how sad the color blue was. I heard beeping sounds getting louder as I go up my room and saw a moderately big, green tank beside the bed. My mom said it would be easier for me to breathe. The terrifying thing I found the most was the bag, hanging on a tall stand with some kind of liquid inside of it. I thought I'd be drinking it but then it was to put inside me in a way that it hurt. When the sharp needle pierced in my skin, I felt different ever since.
I could not stop thinking about why I still need all those things. I only felt dizzy and cold for a bit then it was gone. Mom worries too much about me.
For the past few days in isolation, I ate far more different food there. It felt colder. It did not feel like home at all. I only felt worse every single day. I wanted to know what really happened to me but I could not understand. I always ask my mom and she just keeps peeing from her eyes. The people who visit me often does the same. It looked really stupid. I had no idea why but I knew I did not like the view. I hated it.
"Why do mosquitoes exist?" I asked my mom. She replied with a smile and just told me to clean my hands off. She could not do it for me since she was focused on the road. I love mom.
I guess I'm the only one that will be able to answer my question. But how?
The last time I stood somewhere was the gloomy room I was in. I never saw my mom again and I wondered where did she go? Where did I go? Why am I suddenly here underwater, breathing? I miss my mom.
Now I see the creature up close, looking so familiar this time. I reach out with my fingers and touched its peak. I try finding its eyes, and I finally see all the answers that I have always wondered about.
It is black now. I don't like it but I understand this time.
I like seeing people walking, skipping ropes, smiling, the bright light that crawls in my room from the window when I wake up every morning, I can not imagine a life without those things, and maybe the creature that I gazed at felt the same way too.
