My Deep Thoughts ?

My deeps

Even my smile is fake
I keep smiling in their faces
They think I'm the happiest but inside I'm died 
Inside of me I want attention
I want to be noticed
But
If that happened I will run away
I know myself
I know I'm ugly but don't remind me please
I'm pretty inside
Maybe I keep telling you I'm happy alone
But trust me sometimes I wish there is someone next to me
Someone push me to my dreams
Someone to hold
Someone to tell about my thoughts
Someone to share my best and my worst
Every day seem like yesterday even my tomorrow will be yesterday
I keep remind myself :
Just remember every time you have a good day you will definitely have a worse one
I'm an ugly potato
But
I'm human too
I'm a silent creature
But
I still a human too
You think I'm happy alone
Yes I'm
I don't need dogs like u
Or dumbasses too
I spend my nights thinking about the real me or the fake
I don't care
All I know is I'm happy by loving my damned self
This my feeling every day every second passes
In one hand I say I don't need anyone
But
In other hand I say why people are ignoring me
I'm not a not a monster
Why there is no one special for me
I'm all alone no one is close to me

After the sun sets into the darkness
Tears come to clean my loneliness
I’m comforting my lonely heart again by telling my self I'm different
street is filled with busy people
I'm in the middle
Curious
Are they feeling like me
Are they happy

I’m trying to smile brightly but
I don’t like it

Don’t look at me, I hate this feeling
I want to hide away somewhere,
I want to escape
This world is full of lies
I want to leave away to somewhere,
There is no one by my side
there’s not even anyone to embrace me
Is everyone  the same as me!
I'm trapped in my lies

Can't someone take me out please
I'm bagging you

Pretending to not in pain pretending to be happy pretending to be strong
Is more painful