my anchor

one

yoongi groaned quietly, rolling over in his bed and pressing the pillow to his ears, hoping to muffle the noise.

"taehyung, shut up." he said bitterly, keeping his eyes shut tight. that just resulted in taehyung making more obnoxious noises as he got ready. he loved singing in the shower, and let's just say, yoongi didn't enjoy his singing.

it was only eight in the morning, and yoongi already had a huge headache, and taehyung definitely wasn't helping it. "taehyung i'm serious, shut the fuck up." he rolled over again, finally opening his eyes. 

before him was a loudly singing taehyung, dressed in only a white t-shirt and his boxers, his hair wet from the shower he just took. he let out a quiet yelp seeing yoongi's expression, quickly shutting up.

yoongi sighed irritably and sat up, rubbing his face. "i don't understand why i have to room with you," he spat, keeping his eyes closed. "why can't you just room with your boyfriend, it's like you already live with him."

taehyung rolled his eyes, slipping on some sweatpants. "you know we've tried hyung, but hoseok's roommate doesn't like change, he wants to stay."

yoongi just groaned again. he stood up carefully, trying to ignore the fact that the room was spinning. he mumbled something else to taehyung, something that he can't remember, something he doesn't even know if taehyung could make out.

yoongi shut the bathroom door quickly, stripping out of his sweaty sleep clothes. he turned the shower on and looked in the mirror, staring at the stranger in it.

it felt so weird to look in the mirror, not being able to recognize the person in it. this wasn't different for yoongi. he went through this everyday. he was secretly hoping it would get better, but in the end he knew he was stuck like this.

at least, that's what he thought.

showering was strange. being left with his own thoughts, no filter what so ever. sometimes he just wanted to stay in the hot water, lost in his thoughts. showering was really the own time when he didn't feel so spaced out.

it was almost like the water was keeping him anchored down to earth, which felt calming to him. nothing kept him down to earth anymore. not even his friends, who, were very loud and never gave much attention to yoongi's health.

it's not like he cared anyway.

nobody ever really cared at him, it didn't bother him honestly. he didn't want people to care, because if they did, more people would be upset in the end.

his parents assumed he would've killed himself by now, and to be honest, he did to. he hasn't let them down yet.

he stepped out of the shower shakily, the cold air numbing his senses again. the room started to spin, and his mind started to lose him. he dried himself off and got dressed. the rest of his morning in the dorm was a blur.

he knew he didn't eat, and he knew he probably yelled at taehyung for being too loud again. this was how every morning of theirs went. nothing was off.

taehyung would always wake yoongi up in some loud way, and yoongi would always grumble about something, taking a long shower. some days he would eat, some he wouldn't. he usually felt too sick. 

too sick in the mind.

too sick in the stomach.

A/N

hi hello! 

i know this first chapter is really short, and shitty. 

but trust me, it gets better!

kind of-