Summer Nights | Lams

June 4th

The morning unfolded similarly to the past couple. John was woken up long before Herc and Laf and forced to the cafeteria, despite his whole body crying for more sleep. He and Alex got their food-cereal, today- and sat down across from the Washingtons while they argued about cereal. It felt routine and normal already.

It felt nice.

"It's literally Cinnamon Toast Crunch," Alex said, "How can any other cereal be better?"

John rolled his eyes. "I don't know, why don't you ask Lucky Charms, they seem to know."

Martha laughed while George gave the two a serious look. "Boys, stop this," he said sternly. "The answer is Cheerios, and you both know it."

John snorted, taking a bite of his superior cereal before clearing his throat. "So, I'm sorry if I missed this on the tour, I must not have been listening for it," John began. Alex smirked with a mouth full of cereal, recognizing the small lie. John ignored him and continued. "But I was wondering if we were allowed to go to the stables on free days?"

Martha smiled at him. "Of course you can visit them, just no riding unless it's instructed," she informed him. "All of the buildings are open on free days, except carpentry, too many saws."

Alex frowned. "That's exactly why it should be open."

The four finished breakfast and left, Alex seeing the Schuylers heading towards the cafeteria for their breakfast. He looked at John. "Would you be offended if I went to go catch up with them?" John smiled.

"Not at all," he said. "I have a plan for today anyways."

Alex jogged over to the Schuylers, leaving John to his own devices. John quickly stopped by his cabin to grab his sketchbook and a pencil before heading to the horse stables.

He pushed open the stable door slowly, trying to avoid the squeaking hinges. John looked around. There were eight horses in stalls on one side of the building, with hay bales on the other. John looked down the line of them, seeing a white horse, a couple brown ones, but his eyes stopped at one in the middle.

"Well, you look awfully familiar," John said, smiling and walking over to the stall. "Bay roan Appaloosa, huh? You're gorgeous." He petted the horse's mane and looked at the nameplate outside of the stall. "Your name is Applesauce? Well, do you mind if I draw you for a little while, Applesauce?"

The horse huffed. John grinned and sat down on a hay bale across from Applesauce. He opened up his sketchbook and began drawing the horse's general face. He noted how still she was staying, as if she wanted to make sure he could draw her properly.

"A little fun fact about me, Applesauce," John began as he drew her eyes. "I love horses. Or, I love all animals, but horses especially." Applesauce stared at John, as if she was willing him to continue. He did.

"My mom actually had a horse," he said. "His name was Zip. He was the same as you. Bay roan Appaloosa. I had many a ride on him when I was little. He was always kinda mean to my dad, but loved me. My dad always pretended he was offended, but he wasn't. Besides our dog, my dad isn't much of an animal person."

John stopped talking for a couple minutes as he finished up drawing Applesauce's face. He sighed. "Well, I could draw another horse or go into your stall and draw the rest of you." Applesauce blinked at him, and John rolled his eyes. "If you're gonna look at me like that, then how am I supposed to not keep drawing you?"

John opened the door to the stall and let himself in. He sat down on some hay, careful not to sit on anything unpleasant. He cleared his throat. "You really look a lot like Zip," he said. "You have bigger spots on your hip, though. Zip had a bunch of smaller ones. And his mane was darker."

John sketched out the outline of Applesauce's body. "I haven't actually ridden a horse in a few years. I would ride Zip like once a week, when we had him, though. Not to brag, but I was, uh, I was pretty smart about horses. I like to think I still am. My mom taught me everything I know, though."

Applesauce cocked her head to the side. John drew the spots on Applesauce as he explained. "My mom actually, uh," he felt his words catch in his throat. "She passed away when I was twelve." Applesauce huffed and John cleared his throat. "I didn't think anything could've gotten worse, but a couple weeks after that, Zip got uveitis. It's kind of a common thing in Appaloosas, I guess, especially lighter-colored ones."

John stopped talking for a minute, feeling tears coming to his eyes. He huffed out a laugh, closing his sketchbook. "I don't wanna get water on the drawing or it'll smudge." He took a couple of deep breaths before continuing. "Since we didn't have my mom's income anymore, we couldn't afford the medication for it. We couldn't afford the place in the country that we were living in, either. So..." John's voice cracked and he felt a hot tear run down his cheek.

"We had to give him away," he managed to choke out. He sat there for a minute, letting himself cry as Applesauce looked at him. He cleared his throat, trying to compose himself. "I think Zip knew that a lot of things were going wrong and... and that my mom was gone. He started being nice to my dad... whenever he would go to feed Zip, Zip would nuzzle up against him. When we left him at the horse rescue, he didn't neigh at us or anything. I'm still not sure what he must've been thinking.

"I just hope... I just hope Zip could tell we weren't coming back. And if he couldn't I hope he realized it soon. He trusted us so much, and I know it was the best for him, but... but I don't know if he did."

John sat on the pile of hay for a few minutes, until he finally stopped crying. He looked up at the horse in front of him. "Has anyone ever told you you're a very good listener, Applesauce?" The horse stared at him. "Well, if they haven't then they should."

John reopened his sketchbook, and finished his drawing of the horse's body, before looking up at her. "Martha said today that all the buildings here are open on free days," he said. "So I'm guessing the art studio is. How would you feel about me painting you?" Applesauce blinked at him. "I always used to paint things for my mom... they looked awful, but she loved them anyways. I haven't painted much... actually, I haven't painted at all in years. I think she would want me to paint you, though."

Applesauce walked over to John for the first time and breathed hot air into his face before nuzzling against his hair. John smiled.

"Thanks, girl."

y'all i literally cried while i wrote this chapter. i love horses and i would  d i e  for applesauce and zip

also, catch me using the name of the horse my mom had when i was a kid because i'm either not creative or wanting to make this a heart wrenching as possible for myself