I'm Not "Depressed" [YOONMIN]

Closing the Diary

"Sir, are you okay?" a man spoke. I looked up at him and squinted my eyes, shielding them from the bright June sun.

"Yes, why do you ask?" I replied, closing the black journal.

"Well, you seemed upset," he said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Oh, no I am fine, thank you,"I spoke smiling up at him.

"Well, if you say so." he chuckled and walked away. I stood up wiping the dirt off my butt and grabbed my phone.

One year ago-today the love of my life ran away. Away from me, away from our relationship. "I'm a burden," he said, "You can't love someone who drowns you." he cried. I just stood there, I was frozen. How could someone so perfect think that about himself? "I'm so sorry for being a burden, Min Yoongi. Goodbye," he screamed. "You're not a burden." "you don't drown me." "please don't leave." I wanted to scream at him and grab him and shake the nonsense out of his destroyed little mind. I knew he was sad, but I didn't do anything. He said he was fine, I should have ignored him. I should have kissed him everytime he said that, hugged him every time he sulked, smiled at him every time he frowned. But he left, he ran, and I just stood there. If I had just said something, maybe he would have stayed. I never even got the chance to tell him I loved him. But maybe he's happier now, maybe someone else is kissing his scars and telling him they love him.

I shook my head and dialed Namjoon, my high school best friend's number and put the phone to my ear.

"What do you want, Suga," he replied rudely.

"Can you come pick me up? I'm at-"

"I know where you are. And yeah, I can come pick you up," he said sighing slightly.

"Thanks, man."

"Whatever Yoongi." and he hung up. I took one last glance at the stone I stood beside, tears brimming in my eyes as I read the painful words engraved in the smooth slate of marble.