A Story of Hurt

Part 1

Once there was a girl. She was very shy and also in a different country where she couldnt speak the language. She didn't have many friends so she asked someone she knew if they can help her. They agreed and set her up with a boy that liked her language and wanted to learn it. So they met and talked about many things. It was awkward at first but as they met more and talked more they got to know each other more.

She began to feel hurt and sad every time the guy began to talk about other girls. She didnt unserstand why because she refused to like someone anymore because, for her, liking someone means to end up hurt. So they stayed like that.

They planned to travel together but every time something didnt go as planned or they didnt have the same opinion.

She told him that she was depressed and suicidal but havent cut for two years. He listened and helped her.

She still didnt want to admit that she liked the boy.

Everytime she was with him she forgot about her troubles and worries. He made her laugh but he also frustrated her to no end.

She cut again because she couldnt handle the pain and the hurt anymore. She told only him because she trusted him. And he helped her again without many questions asked.

The depression got worse, she wanted to die. Her anxiety also came back. But he helped her.

She realized that she is beginning to really like him but she didnt want to admit it because feelings for someone, for her, means pain and heartbreak. Every time she fell in love her feelings were not reciprocated. She started acting like a bitch so he wouldn't notice and hurt her.

And then one day she completely fucked up. She told the truth and she thought he was mad at her because he didnt write back anymore. She got physically ill because her anxiety was eating her up. She thought she couldnt breathe. Her thoughts were all over the place, saying hurtful things. That he is never going to forgive her, never likes her and most importantly that she completely and royally fucked everything up. She only wanted to help.

After that argument she realized and admitted that she actually liked the boy. But she was very sure that he isn't going to ever like her back the same way. She didnt know what to do anymore. She stayed up until 2am just thinking, hurt and trying not to hurt herself.

She consideres telling him that she likes him. But they have (had) a good friendship so she doesnt want to ruin everything by making things awkward.

Every time he talks about how much he isnt going to get a girlfriend because no one likes him she just wants to scream at him that he shouldnt be so blind. That she likes him. He also told her that he likes no one but one girl which refused him. It broke her heart.

Now she has no one.