Turning the Page

Chapter 2: Crash

There's this moment, a moment of complete and utter silence when something shatters. That moment where it seems that the room itself inhales, in worried anticipation. This moment lasts a second and yet it is as if the whole world pauses for a spell. At this point, you don't know what will happen next and that anxious feeling takes root. There is a sort of freedom that comes with the feeling of being completely out of control. The harder part is that, again, this lasts a mere second before the sound of the crash begins. Once that sounds arrives all hell breaks loose and you need to start dealing with the consequences. Things breaking always comes as a shock, it makes no sense, just a moment ago everything was just the way it should. What happened? What changed that created this crash? We are never ready for this surprise and yet somehow the universe doesn't seem to ask permission before delivering it to us.

I think the word "surprise" is misused here. In my mind "surprise" ends with party, engagement, gifts. It leaves you expecting something amazing to happen and this certainly is not the case in my situation. Perhaps the more accurate word would be curveball or bombshell. Those, on the other hand, don't exactly fill you with hope.

Today is January 23 and I am now twenty-two and a day old, but at this very moment, I feel about three. A twenty-two-year-old would know what to do. She would take the reins, leading her loved ones to safety and make it all as it should. I, however, am none of that. I instead feel as helpless as a small child. What do I do with this crash? Do I run and try to catch the object before it falls? Do I stand there horror-struck, waiting for the crash uselessly from the side? I don't seem to have much time to make these decisions when the time comes to make them. I always imagine that I will, of course, be the hero, until the moment seems to come and go with no warning. with No rhyme or reason, it seems to just be a bizarre string of events that have nothing to do with me until it hits.

The phone rings and I pick up.

"Hello?" I have a sense of foreboding, even though, for all I know, everything is fine.

"Ava, I think you better come down to the hospital, my love," my mom says.

"I...what do you...what happened?" I stutter.

"We don't know yet, we're on our way to the emergency room now," Mom replies.

Rushing in a whirlwind of emotions, I drive down to Dallion General, which is the closest hospital for miles. I run in, frantic, seeking out the emergency room. I spot it and I sprint down the hall. I find Mom curled up on the floor, with Liam hugging her close. I recognize Doctor Warden speaking with Dad. Doctor Warden has been our family doctor my whole life. He is older with a round kind face, and he reminds me of receiving candy while at the same time he reminds me of the hurts I've endured. Dad has his "all business" face on, a face devoid of emotion and just focusing on what needs to happen next. I look around feeling confused, where is Jay?

"Where is Jay?" I ask, waiting for someone to say, "He's on his way, he just went to the bathroom for a minute." I know though. I knew the second Mom called.

"There's been an accident," Dad says. Horrified, I think of the worst possible outcome.

"Wh-where is he now? How did this happen? When?" I feel lost.

"Jay was coming back from school when a car hit him," Dad says "He was launched down the street from the impact." I want to run, I want to hide, I want to scream. No. "I am going to be strong," I tell myself. Easier said than done, I slowly and painfully pull the fragments of myself back together.

Mom begins a new wave of tears.

"It's decided then," I tell myself, "I will be strong."

"He is going to be fine," I say. "Where is he?"