I shouldn't, I can't, I have to be strong...
I let out a long high-pitched soft quiet muffled howl. Then a low nigh silent sob. Then another as the tears begin to flow. I see flowers, I feel. I feel soft, vulnerable.
It's enjoyable but I feel sad. I feel.
It's nice to feel after being numb and fake, but it hurts.
I wish I could be like this, all the time but never. I want to be happy, I want to feel what's beyond longing. Is it belonging?
Idk.
But indeed isn't that the point... ?
