Domestic abuse

Falling

I lose my footing, I am falling.
I can’t stop.
I try to reach and clutch onto anything that I can,
But that only creates scars. 
I try to scream and shout,
But I only lose my voice.  

I fall further,
further into the abyss of your words,
further into the abyss your destruction.
Further I tumble.
I no longer recognise who I am,
Who the person standing in the mirror is.

I’m reminded that I almost gave you everything.
I’m reminded of all your malicious
traps that I fell so far into.
I’m reminded of what you made me into.

I start to pull myself out of the hole
that you dug so deep for me,
It takes time, but I finally get to the top.
I gasp for breath, like it was my first.
Trying to cleanse myself of you.

I realize that,
no matter how much I change
how I look or try to grow up,
no matter how many tears I cry,
no matter how much I try and forget you,
I will always be scared and
I will never be rid.
of the man who said he cared,

but pushed me into the path of his destruction.

©georginakdingle