Hopeless Hopes

Chpt 2

Finally in view if our modest home I slow Sky down and walk the rest of the way.

I walk Sky into her stall and make sure she has some food and water before I leave. I stroke her and leave.

Sky was Pa's horse before. She was just born when he died. Sky's mom had to be sold along with our other horses.

I approach our house and in a few moments I reach the porch, the door screeches as I swing it open. I try to walk on the tips because if Ma's sleeping, I don't want to startle her. She could think me a man breaking in. I head right to Ma. We share a room. I walk into the room and see her laying down on the bed.

I've missed a week or so of her medication because we ran out. So she was looking and feeling extra bad.

She's laying on the small bed, her body fragile and weak. She looks lifeless. My hearts yearns for last year, she was so happy and full of life. Her once fierce black hair was now dull and lifeless. Her once big smile now only curled into a small respectful smile. She had terrible dark circles and when she was awake- her eyes were screaming of pain.

Slowly but surely, her chest rises and falls. I sigh because I know she's alive. I stride to her bed side, gathering my skirts I sit in the stool.

Cupping her hand in mine I whisper, "Ma, wake up. It's me Agnes, I'm home now." Though I won't be for long I thought to myself. The work won't do itself.

She stirs and flickers her droopy eyelids open, "Agnes, my baby." She gives me a weak smile.

"How are we doing today Ma?" I asked but I know the answer.

"I'm feeling much better than yesterday." Yeah, that's exactly what I expected to hear. She always tells me that, even though I can tell she isn't getting better. Ever so slowly since Pa's passing Ma got worse, until she collapsed at work and was bed ridden since.

I just look at her, taking in every detail of her. Because I hardly remember Pa's face, I couldn't forget Ma's too. I tremble at what I just thought. No. Ma was going to live. I will get that money.

"Look what I got," I dig in my satchel. I pull out the bottle of precious medicine that Ma's life desperately depended on.

I quickly poor the medicine into a teaspoon. The strong smell hitting my nose making me wrinkle it. "Okay Ma, here's the medicine." I put the spoon lightly into her mouth and she swallows. "I'll go set the kettle for coffee. I have to leave for work soon, okay Ma?"

She nods and that's when I head out.

The delightful aroma of coffee fills our small little home and a smile spreads across my face. Years ago Pa would make a kettle of coffee, sharing it with Ma as they sat by the fireplace. How I missed that. A pang of hurt spread through me and I quickly shove the thought away.

"Ma here's your coffee," I place the cup in her hand and kiss her cheek. I place the plate of food in her lap too.

"Agnes, I love you so much. I'm so sorry that I have to be sick and leave you to work so hard." Ma looks at me with guilt.

"Ma this isn't your fault. Don't worry soon I will have the money and we will go to the new doctor that everyone's taking about, he'll cure you Ma I know it." I assure her although I don't even believe what I'm saying.

We hug and I head to the door.

"Bye Ma! Love you!" I shout and close the door behind me.

I climb on Sky and start the journey to Lervoshore. The next town over where I found work.

I open the gate the to farm and continue walking with Sky behind me. I reach the little area where I do the washings.

I tie Sky up and make sure she is in the shade with some grains