On My Block + Cast Imagines

Imagine 03 - Overcoming Overwhelming Grief (Jamal)

My hands shook as I tapped the numbers on the screen for the hundredth time today. I still remembered his number. I could never forget it. 310-982-4500. Before I clicked the green button, I reminisced of the event that led to his death.

:::::

"Come on, y/n, just get on the bike!" Spencer, my boyfriend, chuckled, grabbing my hand.

"No! Think about this; what if I tilt too far and we fall off and die?" I exclaimed, unlatching our hands from each other.

"Fine. Then wait for me. I'll be back in about an hour."

We kissed each other goodbye as I turned to go back into the house.

The hour sped by, Spencer still didn't come back. Then two hours, then three.

I began to worry; I've never been a fan of motorcycles.
Soon, my house phone rang, which my mom answered.

She came to my room, sadness in her eyes.
She told me Spencer was speeding down the highway and got into an accident- he was proclaimed dead.

:::::

The line picked up. Oh my God. Is he alive?

"Hello?" A voice sounded through the phone. A little bit higher-pitched than I remember, but it's been a while, I guess.

"S-Spence? Spencer? Oh my God, I knew you weren't gone! Where are you? Why haven't you been-" I sob out, tears outlining my phone that was laying against my cheek.

"Okay, so I'm not Spencer, but you don't sound okay." The partially squeaky voice seemingly insulted me.

"O-oh. But this is his nu-number. I'm sorry, goodb-" I attempt to leave.

"No! What kind of person would I be if I let a girl hang up crying? I'm Jamal. What's wrong --"

"-Y-Y/N. And it's fine. It's just I lost someone... and I really miss them."

"Oh. Well I could fill in for them. I mean, I doubt I'll be able to be as good as them, but tell me about 'em."

"Well he was perfect-" I begin.

"Then I should probably hang up. I'm nowhere near perfect," Jamal chuckles lightly.

"No. I'm sure you're fantastic!" I exclaim. I don't like when people talk lowly of themselves. So if they do, I try to bring them up. You never know when the last time you'll see somebody is.

"I guess. It's just that my friends don't seem to think so. Let's just say some stuff's goin' down in our group and they think I'm stuck in a fantasy."

"Um, elaborate?" I sniffle, allowing myself to forget about my problems for a moment.

"Well, there's this thing called RollerWorld where I live. It's a myth, really, but I believe in it. Now, my friend's innocence is at stake and I tried my best... and failed. Because of me. If I wasn't so stupid, he could've kept his innocence! It's all my fault."

"I know how it feels to feel like everything's your fault. My boyfr- ex boyfriend died on a motorcycle. He knew how deathly afraid of them I was, considering my dad nearly died on one, so I didn't go with him. But if I did. H-he wouldn't have sped. He wouldn't have died," I choke out.

"Oh. I-I'm sorry. But hey, if he didn't- you know- we wouldn't have met," it's as if you could hear the sad smile behind his voice.

Was that supposed to make me feel better?

"U-uh yeah, I guess-"

"Sorry. That didn't sound as insensitive in my head," I lightly chuckled.

"It's fine. Besides; you're right."

I spent the rest of the night talking to Jamal, who slowly helped me overcome my grief. Of course I didn't forget about Spencer; I couldn't and I never will. He was my first love, I'll probably never be able to. But I do know that this 'Jamal' guy could be good for me. He could be the one to take my mind off things. Make 

4.25.18

-joshie