In Case You Didn't Know

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I wasn’t expecting this.

At all.

Everytime I see her something inside of me is slowly awaken. 

I've been having this rush for quite some time now but I never expected to be swallowed whole by those feelings. Being near her filled me with emotions still unknown to me.

Pero isa lang ang alam ko na totoo..

..at 'yon ay gusto ko siya.

I think I'm doing a pretty good job at hiding my true feelings, though. I had to fight everytime, not to let myself get a little closer to her, let my hands rest on her body a little too long or stare at her beautiful face a little too hard.

Pero minsan kahit gaano ko pinipigilan di ko pa rin maiwasan.

There are some days when I need to force myself to stop thinking about her.

To stop seeing her smile.

To stop imagining her bright eyes.

To stop dreaming of my arms wrapped around her tiny waste.

As I lose myself in my own thoughts, I almost did not hear someone calling my name.

"Donny!" tawag ni Iñigo sabay tapik sa braso ko.

"Oh bakit?" I smiled as if nothing is on my mind.

"You okey bro?"

"Of course! Better than ever."

"Okay" his shoulders shrugged "You said so." and he continued talking to the people on our table.

I watch her from my seat.

She is seated about two tables away, just off the mini stage together with the other female VJs. She’s been laughing and cutting up with everyone at the table while sipping a clear liquid from a tall glass.

With each laugh, her head tilts back, her eyes squint, and her smile takes over her features. She is so radiant. She lights up the room everytime she laughs. 

I want to be there. I want to be at her side, listening to all her stories.

But am I sitting there, laughing and smiling with her?Nope. I am planted firmly two tables away from her in this thanksgiving event with all the MYX staff and bosses after the successful event a while ago.

Then suddenly her phone lit up. She excused her self from the table. Tumayo siya habang nakatitig pa din sa telepono na nasa kanyang mga kamay. On her way out, she passed by our table.

"Shar saan ka punta?" tanong ni Kuya Robi. Tumigil siya sa harap ng aming mesa. She scanned our table. Our eyes met but only for a few seconds and within that few seconds I felt my heart skipped a beat.

Lahat ng tao sa table namin naka tingin sa kanya. She is dressed in a simple jeans, black hoodie and vans.

"Si Mommy" she said while pointing at her phone. "Sagutin ko lang." she smiled.

"Wag ka muna pasundo sa Mommy mo. Stay a little longer." nagulat ang lahat sa sinabi ni Turs.

Hindi na sumagot si Shar. Nginitian niya lang si Turs at nagpaalam na sa amin upang sagutin ang tawag ng Mommy niya.

After Shar left, everyone continued with what they were doing. Gusto ko sana siyang sundan agad kaso baka mahalata ako. I allowed few minutes to pass before following her.

"Excuse me muna guys. Bathroom lang." I announced.

They just nodded. Everyone in our table is busy listening to Kuya Robi's funny stories.