MY CRAZY WRITING OUTBURSTS!

Too Late...

Ambulances, i hear ambulance sirens, i think.
Everything's blurry, i can't tell if its me or the actual world.

Fresh out the shower, I'm spritzing my favourite perfume, Sauvage by Dior, buttoning up my cream, not white, Ralph Lauren shirt, zipping my beige cigarette trousers up.
Pushing gel through my hair to make it stay in place but not to make it look crispy. I think I'm now ready i told myself. I down my class of Italian red wine, which is delicious by the way.

I call an uber to drive me to the club I'm meeting all my besties at, Pulse.
Usually the conversations i have in Ubers are semi decent, but today... today it was just plain weird. The guy driving the Uber just wouldn't stop talking about the most random things; the weather, how much the petrol is these days, and then about the conversation he had earlier with someone he drove to central Florida... like why on earth do i care? It was a real shame since he was playing some real good tunes. That i could not hear!
I look out the car window and see I'm a few minuets away from the club Pulse. i pull my phone out of my overly tight trouser pocket and text my mate that I'm two minutes away. I'm hoping he's not too drunk already, its only half 8 but still.

I pull up outside the club, seeing my pals, looking absolutely Gorg of course. Obviously I'm already in the need of the loo. So we queue up, it takes about ten minutes until we actually get into the place. The second we walk in there the heat hits me from all the over heated bodies, the lights shine in my eyes, purple, blue, orange and green, the bases from the songs all mashed together sends a strong beat through my whole body making all my organs shake. By then I'm busting for a wee so i head straight to the restroom while my mates grab us all some drinks, of course i order a Pina Colada, i have to start the night out right.

I get into the restroom, getting away from the loud music and overly crowed dance floor, giving my self a 2 minute break from it all while i move my hair about in the toilet mirrors and straightening out my shirt before i go back out there and brave it out.
The second i step out of the restroom i feel that heat hit me again and the sounds overtake my body and the lights blind me. I head straight the small group of friends i came with to dance, drink and have fun!

Three hours, twenty minutes and 15 drinks later we're totally smashed. Little did i know i was two hours away from the worst night of my life. When your smashed two hours go by fast.

Out of no where, BOOM!
I feel a sudden pressure after a loud noise, everything goes dead silent. Everything is moving in slow motion. Theres no sound, no life, no air, just scared faces moving slow but i can tell its suppose to be fast.
I see nothing, smoke, i see smoke.
I hear petrified screams, coming from all angles. I've finally put a thing to the noises i hear, gunshots. I hear lots and lots of gunshots.
I'm scared, i can't move, I've lost all my friends in the cloudy smoke.
I don't understand whats going on, is my life over?
My life is over. I'm going to die tonight.

I never got to say i love you to my parents and thank them for all they've done for me. My sister, our last conversation we had was two nights ago over face time, we had the most pointless conversations ever, and it was our last. We just keep saying stupid words to each other to make ourselves laugh.

I come back to reality, with tears streaming down my face. I fall to the floor to lie there, to accept my fate.
i cant do anything. I cant move. just cry.
my screams are useless, pointless. Never the less i still scream, HELP! I NEED HELP! SOMEONE PLEASE HELP! I still try, i have to try.

Ambulances, i hear ambulance sirens, i think.
Everything's blurry, i can't tell if its me or the actual world. I cant tell if I'm dead or alive anymore. As i look around theres bodies laying flat on the ground, just like me. I also cant tell if there dead or alive.

Just then in the moment of that thought, that second in my life, i feel a excruciating pain hit my chest. The feeling floods my body, its a heavy pain. i cannot move, definitely not now, not ever.
Everything is dull, lifeless, like me.
I close my eyes slowly but surely. i say goodbye. no one can hear me, no one will care. But i say goodbye.

Ambulances, i hear ambulance sirens.
But it's too late.