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𝗁𝖺𝗇 𝗌𝖾𝗈𝗃𝗎𝗇,
its been a year since you died, and my heart is still trying to heal, its going to take time but I know it will heal eventually.but I know that even when it does heal, it will still hurt. just like when broken bones heal, they still hurt when its cold.
I've learned a lot throughout this year, that even with you gone I managed to survive, it was hard, really really hard but I did. its amazing that before you died, I used to rely on you like you were oxygen, well I suppose that was because I loved you too much.
I know you loved me, everyday you told me you did. but it wasn't just your words that told me you loved me, it was every little gesture and heartfelt look that I saw you sending me from across the room. I'm grateful that you loved me because even though I'm still breathing and I still have a lot of life left in me, you will always be the most amazing thing to ever happen to me.
and I promise that I won't become some old spinster, I will look for love again but just not yet. my heart is still in your hands but when I'm ready, I will get out there again and I will be happy again with someone else.
I don't think that ill write to you anymore, because if I do, I won't be able to move on and I need to. even if that means letting you go but you will always be with me, I know that. I love you and I always will.
han seojun, you will always be the love of my life.
