The Passage (h.s)

Chapter Sixteen

***Warning adult content. Not recommended for young readers. Another note, if you don't like it don't read it. Just move along. For the rest of you, enjoy the rebooted version of this chapter***

I'm shaking the entire drive to Harry's house. I can't pinpoint why I'm so scared about seeing him again. Or why I'm having a difficult time accepting someone so amazing in my life. I should welcome this happiness with open arms, but I suppose when your love life has always been a major mess, it can be difficult to adjust to a different dance. It's the unknown of what's to come, the fear that things will go terribly wrong and torn from my grasp. 

My stomach is tied in knots, and I'm nervously fidgeting with anything I can get my hands on.

"Willow, just calm down and stop playing with the zipper, you're driving me crazy."

"Hmm? Oh, sorry Sam I didn't even know I was doing that. I'm a little nervous."

Apparently, I've been opening and closing the zipper on my bag the whole time we've been in the car.

"I see that. Take a few deep breaths and just relax. We're almost there, so calm down."

Calm down? Ha, that's hysterical, I don't know how to stay calm. The mixture of my nerves and excitement has me wound up tighter than a spring. The thoughts in my brain are going back and forth like a pro tennis match.

I nod my head; I don't have the energy for this conversation with her. It's best to keep my mouth shut for now, I don't have the best track record for communicating when I'm stuck in my head like this. Regardless of my fears, I just want him to hold me and to feel his lips on mine.

The scenery out the window changes, high-end clubs and tattoo parlors are replaced by a  residential neighborhood with absurdly large homes. Thankfully Niall is with me, although I've been to Harry's place before, the house is hard to find. If you haven't been there, you're most likely not going to find it, which is probably the reason he bought it.

We make our way to the front gate and Niall stops his car. My palms are sweating, my heart races, and I'm on the verge of hyperventilating. Sam gets out of the car and hops in the backseat to try and calm me before we go any farther.

"Sweetie, you're gonna be okay. There's no reason to be nervous. He wants you here, trust me. Take a few deep breaths and then you can go see him. I'll stay with you as long as you want me to."

"What if you're wrong, what if he's angry and doesn't want anything to do with me?"

"You've got to be kidding me. Do you think he can just turn his feelings off over something like this? Stop talking yourself out of something good."

"Ok, got it. I'm ready, I can't wait any longer. If I do, I might change my mind."

Sam tucks some strands of hair behind my ear and kisses me on the forehead.

"That's my girl."

She jumps back in the front seat and Niall looks over his shoulder, giving me one more chance to change my mind before he opens the gate. I nod and motion for him to go ahead.

Every second of waiting feels like an eternity. My world is in slow motion and I'm praying for it to return to its normal pace. We approach the top of the drive and I see him standing next to his Audi, he's getting ready to leave. His head is hung, and he looks miserable.

Two tears roll down my cheek and ironically land over my heart. It's excruciating to know I'm the cause of his pain, and I hate myself for it. My life has been such a cliché love story for the past two days, it's a rather ironic twist from my past.