My sweet memories

1: my shattered heart

My name is blaze smith I have long straight hair that reaches mid back and I would be lying if I said I was gorgeous nope I have average looks so you could call me a normal face in the crowd I didn't stand out much anyway,well you guess wrong because my average life is an assassin and my lover is the chairman of the biggest and number 1 best company in the world so my normal and your normal may be alot different from one another

I'm just a normal girl that fell in love and got my heart broken at first ,you must have thought oh her boyfriend dumped her or her boyfriend cheated on her no my lover and I were deeply inlove but I made us shatter, at first we were always happy, I had a lot of friends ,there was not a day were you would not see me or my friends smilling but as the saying goes nothing last forever

It all started when me and my lover were at the mall and we went home and went to sleep next morning every thing was average  just like my life went on some missions killed a bunch of guys but all that changed in just one night because my lover confessed that he fell in love with somebody new and wanted to end our relationship I couldn't forget the words he said to me that day

" Blaze darling  you know I love you with all my heart but sometimes things change and pls know that i will always love you I'm so so so sorry"

then he proceded to get on his knees to beg me to hurt him to ease my pain but I didn't because I loved him to much to hurt him even if he hurt me

You know what happened next  I moved on I still kept him in my heart Since it was my fault that we broke  up in the first place I really shoudn't have intoduced them together and gave them so much time to cultivate their love but like I said I moved on and found someone new the number one best assassin in the world by the way we became aqauintances to friends and finally lovers but somehow the gods really hated me and you know what it happened again the fell inlove with my friend and said the same words 'he' said

" Blaze baby I love you so so much but I...I am so sorry but I love someone else now "

You think I would have learned my lesson by now but your wrong, dead wrong I closed my heart and didn't  let anyone in until he appered

It was about the time I stopped being an assassin usually to those who want to leave they die but ofcourse with my perfect record and I became the best asassin's lover well ex-lover now anyways. they  did make an exeption  for me anyways besides they can't handle his anger after he still tecnically 'loves me' as he says so he would not let anyone hurt me moving on...

Back to the time I met him he was the best hacker in the world we didn't really talk much but we gradually fell inlove but this time I was going to keep him but danm it happened again after that it happened a couple more times it became the world's best artist then idol then actor then model  and finally became the mafia head the world's largest and most powerful gang in the underworld and their leader became my lover the demon king as every one says it you would usually think he would be my most powerful lover but no because each of my lovers my 7 ex-lovers each owned a quarter of the world so the were all equally balanced

Funny actually all my lover's were all famous and each of them were the world's best

After that it bacame a blur when I asked my "friend's" what happened they said I turned insane I killed all the people I saw until I got tired and passed out luckily they didn't see my face and after that I met one of my lovers and still the same they said their sorry by they didn't meet each other I ran into them one by one when I was in the mall they each  gave me the big diamonds they saw and said I love you usually a married man or a woman dosen't say that he\she has a lover would not say these things but they still love me that's for sure but not as much as they love their new wives or girlfriend but I wasn't complaining I'm just happy that they love me back and still have a place for me  in their hearts I could see that half belonged to me while the other half was their new lovers

And now 3 years later it is really really hilarious how my life became this way but I was happy at this very moment I was in front of a giant door that led to a room, the ballroom to be exact and inside the very same room were all my ex-lovers and their lovers were in ,i never really saw the faces of their new lovers  that's right I never really saw them.

I couldn't resist the urge to roll my eyes . Your probably thinking Wow this girl is stupid
That's right I am stupid
   Stupid for still loving them
   Stupid for not letting them go
   Stupid for not  just forgeting about them
   Stupid, just stupid ... Yes,  I am very much a stupid person but can you blame me and don't answer that question your most likely to say yes, so what, I loved them with all my heart,  body,  mind and soul so yeah fuck you, to think you can just forget someone that you have loved with all your heart... it may be easy for you but not for me

And for all those people who can't let go either those aren't the people who truly loved... call me wrong or call me a fool but I know that I am right

Now , right now at this very moment of my life I'm about to see 'them' with their new lovers or their happily married air that surounds them.

Fuck this shit