Amina

The Smile

September 23

She saw me.

Today in the cafeteria, she looked right at me. I was sitting a few tables away, keeping my head down, trying to focus on my tray of food, but I kept glancing over, waiting for her to appear. The feeling was stronger than usual—this need to see her, to be close to her.

Then, she walked in, as quietly as ever, slipping into her usual seat by the window. She stared at her tray, barely moving. I couldn't take my eyes off her, even though I kept telling myself to stop, to look away before anyone noticed. I was trying so hard to be invisible that it almost felt like a game. But that's when it happened.

She looked up, her gaze landing directly on me. There was no mistaking it. Her eyes locked onto mine with this intensity that made my skin prickle, like she was peeling back every layer, seeing everything I'd thought, everything I'd done. It was like she knew.

My face went hot, and I looked down, staring hard at my tray, trying to pretend I hadn't noticed. But my heart was racing, pounding so loud I was sure she could hear it from across the room. I took a deep breath, counted to three, and forced myself to look back up, thinking maybe she'd already moved on, that I'd just imagined the whole thing.

But she was still looking at me.

There was something strange in her expression, something I couldn't place. It wasn't a smile—not exactly. It was more like a smirk, a slight curve of her lips, subtle but unsettling, as if she'd been waiting for me to notice. She held my gaze, her eyes dark, unblinking, her face unreadable. I felt trapped, like she'd caught me in a snare I hadn't seen coming.

For a moment, I couldn't move. I was paralyzed under her gaze, my mind buzzing with a thousand questions, all of them lost the second I looked into her eyes. They were darker than I'd realized, darker than I'd seen before. And they were looking right through me, into something deeper than I could even understand.

Then, just as suddenly, she looked away, her gaze dropping back to her tray as if nothing had happened, as if I hadn't spent the last eternity caught in her stare. She picked up her fork, stirring her food around absently, her expression smooth and unreadable.

I sat there, frozen, my heart pounding, my mind racing with questions that didn't make sense. Why had she looked at me like that? Did she know I'd been following her? Did she know about the man in the woods, the way he'd looked at me, the way he'd smiled?

I don't know. But part of me thinks she does. And the strangest part? I think she wanted me to know it.

September 24

I tried avoiding her today. I couldn't shake the feeling that I'd crossed some kind of line, that I'd gone somewhere I wasn't supposed to go. All day, I kept my head down, moving through the halls without looking up, skipping lunch just to avoid sitting anywhere near her. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop thinking about her. Her gaze, the way it held me, like she'd seen something in me no one else ever had.

It should scare me. It does scare me. But it also... pulls me in. Every time I close my eyes, I see her face, those dark eyes staring back at me, that almost-smile that I still can't explain. And the worst part is, I want to see it again. I want her to look at me like that, to make me feel that rush, that thrill, even if it terrifies me.

I'm starting to think that maybe I don't want to avoid her. Maybe I want to be seen.

September 25

Today, she passed me in the hallway. I was heading to English, lost in my own head, when I saw her coming from the opposite direction. I froze, my heart jumping into my throat, every nerve in my body buzzing with that familiar mix of excitement and dread. I told myself to keep walking, to just act normal, but my feet wouldn't move.

She walked right up to me, her face expressionless, her steps as silent as always. I thought maybe she'd pass me by, that she'd look through me like she always did. But she didn't.

She stopped. Right in front of me. Close enough that I could smell her perfume, this faint, smoky scent that made my pulse race. I felt my face go red, my hands starting to shake. I didn't know what to say, what to do. I just stood there, trapped, helpless.

And then, she smiled.

It was a small smile, barely there, but it was real. And it wasn't the kind of smile you'd give to a friend, or a stranger, or even someone you liked. It was something else, something that felt like a secret, like she knew something I didn't, something I couldn't even begin to understand.

"Ethan," she said, her voice soft, barely a whisper.

I don't remember telling her my name. I don't remember anyone else saying it, not in front of her. But she knew. She knew my name. She said it like it belonged to her, like she'd known it all along, like she'd been waiting for the perfect moment to use it.

"Ethan," she repeated, her smile fading, her eyes darkening. "Don't follow me anymore."

And then, before I could say anything, before I could even react, she walked away, disappearing into the crowd like she'd never been there at all.

September 26

I can't stop replaying what happened yesterday, the way she looked at me, the way she said my name. I tried telling myself it didn't mean anything, that it was just a coincidence, that I was reading too much into it. But I can't shake the feeling that she knows more than she's letting on, that she's hiding something, something she doesn't want me to find out.

I don't know what she meant by "don't follow me." Does she know? Has she known all along?

I can't explain it, but I don't think she was angry. It was more like... a warning. Like she was trying to protect me from something, something I don't understand yet. But there's another part of me, a part I can't ignore, that thinks maybe she doesn't want me to stay away. Maybe she's testing me, daring me to see how far I'll go.

The rational side of me says I should listen, that I should stay away from her, forget I ever saw her. But another part, a part I can't control, is already planning how to see her again. I need to know. I need to understand.

September 27

I followed her again. I know I shouldn't have. I know I'm ignoring everything she told me, ignoring that warning she gave me. But I couldn't help it. There's something pulling me in, something I can't resist, no matter how hard I try.

She went back to the park, slipping into the trees just as the sun was starting to set. I stayed close this time, moving quietly, keeping my eyes on her even when the shadows made it hard to see. She didn't look back, didn't hesitate, just kept walking deeper into the woods, her steps sure and silent.

And then she stopped. In the same clearing as before, standing perfectly still, her face turned toward the trees. She stood there for what felt like an eternity, just... waiting. I hid behind a tree, watching her, my heart racing, my breath shallow. I knew I should leave, that I was in over my head, that I'd gone too far.

But I didn't. I couldn't.

And then, just as the last light slipped from the sky, she turned, her gaze landing right on me. Her eyes seemed darker than ever, filled with shadows I couldn't understand. She smiled again, that same unsettling smile, and raised a single finger to her lips.

"Shhh," she whispered, the sound barely reaching my ears.

And then, without another word, she turned and vanished into the trees, leaving me alone in the dark, with nothing but the memory of her smile and the lingering scent of her perfume.