Begin Again (one shot)

Begin Again

2 years after..

"mama, I want of those.. you should've bought it for me"

"honey, stop your tantrums, I told you its bad."

While walking in a cold street of Cali, I heard that conversation of a mother and her daughter. I remember when I was 5 years old. I never tantrums, maybe that's why I got all the things I wanted.

I put my coat on my arms and opened the gate as I was entering the property of Mrs. Jones, i lived alone in one of her room.

"hi Lari, you have new mail today" she said smiling and held me 3 mails, again.

"thank you, mrs. Jones" I get the mails from her hand and walked inside the house, directly to my room. I put them on my bed to dressed myself up.

The snail mails are from my mom and sister, I told them not to visit me here so they kept sending me those. But I never replied. Even once. I opened my yahoo account to see if someone emailed me, again.

There! I saw Xavy, March and Yella sent me new one. Its been a years, after that night I never talked to anyone of them anymore. I'm not mad or upset to any of them but I hate to see them seeing me like that, so I decided to book a flight to California and build a new life with me alone.

While drinking water I read the e-mail Yella sent me.

Ris,

How're you there? Its been a years, Ris. Can you at least contact one of us. We really wanna know what happened to you. I miss you, Clarise. I wish your doing fine wherever you are now. oh, by the way. Here's my new number 09*********. Give me a ring in case you decided to go back here and in case you miss us too as we miss you!

Good luck! Take Care!

- Yels

I smiled as I thought that even I never replied to any of their emails, they never stopped caring about me.

My phone vibrated on the table, I smiled as I see another reason to smile.

Brinx Calling..

I answered it immediately,"hi"

(hi beautiful, wanna hang out later afternoon?)

"mm, yeah, sure"

(good. sunduin kita, ha?)

"oookay!"

(by the way, don't wear high heels. I hate it!)

He hanged up the call as he said that.

I prepared myself up. Alam ko kasing mainipin talaga si Brinx. I met him in one of the party here in Mrs. Jones' property. People here loves to party.

I took a deep breath in the mirror, he didn't like it when I wore high heels, but I do. I think I'm beautiful wearing those. But he said, its so hassle to wear a high heels. He really hate it.

Exactly 3pm he fetched me up. Mahilig syang magbigay sakin ng 3 roses. And to tell you the truth, we are not couple, he's not my boyfriend. But I'm starting to love him. We are 5 months dating, hinihintay nya talaga. I can see his sincerity.

In his car, I played 'Vanilla Twilight' by Owl City. I love this song.

"Wednesday pala ngayon, I have 3 meetings tomorrow. buti na lang mada-date kits ngayon" sabi nya habang nakangiti. He throw his head back laughing like a little kid. I pursed my lips and smiled as I see him happy with me.

"pasalamat ka sumama ko sayo" I told him as I'm teasing him.

Di na sya sumagot. Hinawakan nya lang yung kamay ko habang nagdri-drive. I love it when he's doing that.

"why do you always playing that song whenever you hop in my car?" sabi nya sakin.

"I love that song"

"I didn't get this song"

"sorry but I do" then tongue's out at him.

We had a great afternoon, eating our snack at our favorite café. Habang kumakain, lagi naming napaguusapan yung family nya, how they spend Christmas and holidays, where they already travelled, and the movies that his family watches. I merely told him stories about me, so he kept asking. I know that he wants farther information but I wont talk about it. Sabi naman nya di nya ko pipilitin hangga't di ko pa kaya magkwento. But I think I'm being unfair with him. I already know all of his story pero yung akin, sa friends at family lang. Gusto nya din malaman kung bakit ako nag decide na tumira dito. Mag isa.

Tomorrow after that day, since he was so busy we set a dinner date. I went to a cafe, earlier than the time we set. And to my surprise he's already there.

"your early" sabi nya. He's busy, I was expecting he'd be late but he got here early and he stand and wave, I walked to him. He pulled the chair and helped me in, and he dont know how nice it is, but I do.

"as you are" I told him.

"di ko kaya pag hintayin ang babaeng mahal ko" sagot nya.

We enjoy each others company that night, and I was never been that happy.

Alam kong mahal ko na yung lalaking nasa harap ko ngayon. Pero di ko pa rin pinapakawalan sarili ko sa kahapon kaya ayoko munang sabihin sakanya. Gusto ko sanang syang bigyan ng chance pero gusto ko din munang ayusin sarili ko.

Its been a years but I still haven't moved on totally. Hindi ko na mahal si Rob. Pero takot pa rin akong magmahal. Ayoko na masaktan ng ganun ulit kaya ayoko muna sabihin kay Brinx yung nararamdaman ko. But I've been thinking that I might lose him when I still let this fear control my life.

"Brinx, I'll tell you something" sabi ko sakanya. Hinawakan nya yung kamay ko tsaka directly na tumingin sa mga mata ko. Nasa parking lot na kami at pauwi. After seeing him that happy with me, I decided to tell him everything.

"we've been dating for 5 months, and I think that's enough to know you well. and actually, its enough time to prove myself that I'm.. falling.. umm, yeah" okay, I'm already here, I can do this!

"falling what?" said he while smiling. Well, I know he already know what I'm going to say. TSS, this monkey!

"I love.. you.. I love you" I said tuttering and nervous.

Ngumiti sya sakin,"you mean? you love me"

I laugh at him,"I just said I love you, and yes, I mean it"

"shit! you love me!" sigaw nya tsaka ko binuhat at inikot. Natawa lang ako sa ginawa. Niyakap ko din sya. Ngayon ko na pinapakawalan ang sarili ko. He kissed me and I did the same. I felt to be love again at this time. I missed this. This was for the first time, what's past is past. And now he's my present. I really want him to be my future.

"I love you, Clarise. I wont promise anything but I'll do anything to make you happy"

I guess, he's my happy ending.

~~~~~~~

This is the book 2 of 'Breakeven'. Walang connect sa story but I still recommend to read the book 1 para malaman nyo kung bakit takot magmahal si Clarise. (on external link)

Salamat sa pagbabasa. ♥

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- Ate Lhiz™