Blue Jeans || h.s.

Chapter Eight: Part I

"Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new, never thought it through. Crawling back to you." - Do I wanna know? by Arctic Monkeys (I am aware of how much I use this song, haha)

"And if I may just take your breath away, I don't mind if there's not much to say. Sometimes the silence guides the mind to move to a place so far away." - Sweater Weather by The Neighborhood

(Also aware of how much I use this song, too.)

"We're self-imploding

under the weight of your advice

I wear a suitcase

under each one of my eyes

[...] back to that bar in Tokyo, wherr the demons from my past leave me in peace.

I'll be animating every night, the grass will be greener on the other side, and the Vampires and te Wolves won't sink their teeth.

I'm sick of dancing with the Beast.

No matter how much it needs me, go and follow someone else's lead." -Tokyo (Vampires and Wolves) by The Wombats

"[...] and the more I give, the less I get,

needing fairground rides just to spark her smile,

[...]

Stop talking, stop talking

I need a lover, not a friend tonight,

I'm leaving, I'm leaving

I'm not cut out for the modern life..." - 1996 by The Wombats

"[...] 'cos I've got problems with my sleep, and we're not the same, and I wear that on my sleeve

so I'm moving to New York 'cos I've got problems with my sleep. Looks like Christmas came early, Christmas came early for me.

I put 1 foot forward, and ended up 30 yards backs,

and am I losing my touch, or am I just completely off the track?

and I don't know why I want to voice this out loud, it's therapeutic somehow..."

- Moving to New York by The Wombats

___________________

I don't remember how I went to sleep that night, but I somehow managed to lay myself down in my covers and not shed a single tear. I had become quite the proffessional at holding in my tears, it was one of my most practiced tricks. How sad was that?

My mother called me again the next morning, and it was what woke me up. I don't know how I would have managed to get out of bed if it weren't for her call. She asked me if I was coming for my sister's release, I said I'd try to get there. Heaven knew I didn't want to go. I didn't want to see her after everything that occurred. I was still scared shitless of her.

The next two hours were a daze as I layed numbly on my cover and wished desperately I had someone to converse with. Not really about my problems: I was never one to speak of those. But rather about the weather and our plans for the day or just anything to get my mind off of things. I was always one to do that.

After realizing I did have someone to talk to: I picked up my phone and found enough courage (After, like, 30 minutes of just staring at the digits in my screen, may I add.) to punch in Harry's number. Maybe it was the loneliness that gave me courage. Perhaps I just wanted to make sure I hadn't freaked him out with my - uh - episode, last night. I'm still trying to figure out if I was fortunate he answered in less than two rings. I could feel my chest tightening from anxiousness as I heard his voice on the other side of the line? God, it almost made me want to hang up and barf.