Torn (One Direction)

Spilling my guts.

"And that is why I look and act like this." I was now sitting on Zayn's lap his arms around me comfortingly. I had just told him everything. He knew the perfect things to say. Never once did he judge me and I loved him for that.

"My advice to you is, smile. It really brightens your mood. So does laughing. Laughing is the best medicine." He said looking down at me.

"Why should I smile, if I'm so miserable though?" I asked contradicting him.

"Because it helps. It would also help if you talked to the others. They'd help you through it too. I promise." He said and let go of me. "You wanna go out there and tell them?" He asked and I shook my head. "At least come out and hang out with us."

I stood up and walked out there with Zayn. I got a grin from Niall, a cheeky smile and wink from Harry, a grin bigger then Niall's from Louis and a heartwarming shy smile from Liam.

"I'm sorry about that guys.." I said quietly.

"It's all right. Just as long as you're not hurt." Niall said reassuringly.

"Actually, I need to tell you guys something.." I said and for the second time that day I told my story to guys I barely know.

By the time it was over I was crying and I had Louis and Niall hugging me.

"Is that why you can't listen to Torn?" Liam asked and I nodded.

"Okay, Louis, Niall, I need air. Off. Now." I said pushing them off me and standing up I was already at the door, getting some weird looks from the guys when I realized I was still in short yoga shorts and a tank top.

"Oh right, I'm not in Cali anymore.." I said and ran upstairs changing into black sweats and an oversized black hoodie.

"You need a new wardrobe." Louis said when I got downstairs.

"No, I don't." I said bluntly.

"Yes, you do. If we are going to make you happy again, you need new clothes." He argued studying me.

"No. I'm not getting a new wardrobe. One, I don't have enough money for a brand new wardrobe and two, I'm fine with how I am." I said and made a face that said That's final. Bring it up again and you'll be dead.

"Fine." He said and pouted.

"Dinner!" Mel called and I got up, pushing Niall to the ground and beating all of the boys tot he table.

"FOOD!" I yelled as I saw the amazing looking meatloaf my aunt made.

"A girl beat Niall to food for the first time!" Liam said chuckling

"This girl likes food." I said pointing at myself.

"Well, if you can eat as much as Niall, we'll be impressed." Zayn says smiling.

"You should be. You're in the presence of awesomness." I said and tore into the plate of food Mel brought me.

"Well, if Mrs. Awesomness would smile, she'd be even awesomer." Liam said smiling. It was very tempting to smile but I couldn't force myself to do it. Instead I decided to burn him with my words.

"You'd like that, wouldn't you, Payne?" I asked smirking at him.

"I would very much. You have such a lovely smile and it's obvious the world hasn't seen it in a while." He said calm and collected.

"Well, the world's not going to see it anytime soon. Unless you can bring my mom back from the dead?" I said coldly.

"I can't. But you have your aunt, your dad, and us. You don't know how lucky you are. It could have been so much worse." He said and I felt anger wash over me.