Lonely love

Ch5

4 months into the school year.

A ring came from my phone.
Maybe: Josh Goldberg
Read the text from the info screen I tapped on the notification with alight doubt in my heart.
Thinking to myself what would I would say;  I was still sad about the topic but now I felt this anger.

After texting him for a while to get to an understanding of what had happened and why he didn't text me he was ok.

After that, I felt this light resonate out my body like everything was right in the world

I am still hanging out with Henry on the weekdays and sometimes on the weekend; personally spending time with him was the greatest on the weekends especially when we were alone.

I was starting to get this Strange feels like Henry was supposed to be there and when he wasn't I felt this emptiness.
Then the jealousy came, every time I saw him with someone else I felt this sense of betrayal.

It wasn't long till all I wanted was Henry in my life.
I knew it was wrong but I didn't want to admit it.

Around the end of Friday Henry asked me if I wanted to sleep over.
The thought of spending the night at his house made me excited.

When I got home from a long day of school and hanging out with Henry I laid down and thought about what might happen.
Letting my imagination run wild wasn't the best idea because now I wanted him even more.

When the night came and it was time to spend the night I felt my blood pumping as if I knew what was going to happen.

I asked if I could lay in bed with him then without thinking I asked him if I could lay my head on his back.
My face began to burn.

What shocked me after I asked what was he said yes.
It was like a mental touchdown to me.

Just laying there in the night next to him made me want to stay awake as long as I could.
When I thought he was sound asleep I opened my eyes and moved back a little just to admire him just sleeping.

Henry was everything I wanted in my life and to just lay next to him made me feel this happiness I never thought I would feel again.

Moments later I started trying to sleep so I wouldn't be so groggy in the morning.
Without even thinking I slowly put my arm around him.

I freaked out in my mind for a while thinking about what he would say if he just woke up so I pretended to be asleep just in case.

After a few minutes, I felt this movement from Henry.
One of his legs moved against my leg sending my straight into arousal.

Panicking a little in my mind I try to settle down before trying to even move.
The last thing I wanted was for him to wake up and notice.

When I calmed down a bit I started to move closer to him as if I was going to spoon him.

I knew what was ok doing and I knew what not ok to do.
Although the temptation to just let my hand rest on his well-toned butt I kept it above the waist not even daring to reach below that.

Unlike most people, I had an opportunity to take complete advantage of Henry but from my heart, all I wanted was his love and to please him.

The moment I got my arm underneath his body I looked for his hand.
I knew that it was wrong but from the rush of hormones I did not stop.
When I found his hand I grasped it slowly as if it was the most delicate object on the planet.

To my surprise, Henry gripped back.
I thought that it might just be a dream but when he started moving slowly away then back again I just knew he was awake.

I didn't want to say anything because what if he wasn't, didn't want to risk it.

I laid my ear against his back.
When I heard his heartbeat it wasn't the normal beat it was rushing like when you like someone or something.
At that point, I was sure he was awake but I still remained silent.

A few minutes pass and we are both up.
Henry got up trying to play it off as if nothing happened for a bit then mentioned it for a bit.

He looked at me and told me if i knew he wasn't gay.
My heart sunk and my heart beat went back to a regular beat.