test ( a hunger games fanfic )

I hold my breath. It's crazy for me to be so nervous. It's a simple test. Why am I so scared? It isn't the end of the world if I fail. Right? It might be tough for us at first but we would survive. We always have. My hands are shaking and sweaty. I can barely keep myself from screaming. I don't know if it's my nerves or the fact that I'm in a hospital. Hospitals don't scare me they just remind me of painful memories. I look back at the waiting room where he sits. Peeta. seeing his smiling face of hope makes me want to succeed even more. how could I let him down. he wants this even more than I do. I don't even know why I want this. I vowed I would never have children. but that was different. It would be pain the child would wake to. It would be fear of being picked. It would be cruel to let them see that world. Now it is healing they'll wake to. They would't see my past but their future. I see a nurse wave me over from my hallway seat. I run my hands over my jeans. My heart is beating loudly in my chest. I steal a glance at him one more time. He's smiling and giving me the thumbs up. I can tell he's nervous too but staying strong for me. Everything he's done has been for me. This time I'll do something for him. I turn back to face the nurse. she's smiling too. I normally wouldn't trust people like this. but I need to learn how. I let the nurse guide me into a room. I had a different nurse do a simple check up on me a while ago. That was easy. This is hard. the nurse motions for me to sit on the bed. I walk to it and try to get comfortable. It's hard when all i see is the past. The nurse smiles at me then leaves. I instantly start to panic again. I led a rebellion this should be easy right? I take a breath. It's hard to even breath. I look around the room. It's a standard hospital room. One chair next to a small computer, a few cabinets, and a sink. There's a mirror above the sink in which I turn to look into. Like I could see the future if I look hard enough. It doesn't reveal anything but my face. the face that is hard from what I've seen. The face of a thirty year old who has seen more than someone twice my age. I have my hair in a braid. It's silly but it is something that doesn't change.I need to remember some things don't change as the world changes. I don't miss my past life. I just miss the people. The small things. The important things. The sugar cubes. The pearl. The smell of the hob. Of my family that I lost. I now only have my mother and I have Peeta now to which makes life easier. If this test works then I'll have more family. The door opens and in walks a man I'm starting to know more. Doctor Mullen smiles at me as he sits down. " good morning Katniss. lets just do a few tests and we'll see how it goes" Doctor Mullen says to me and I give a week attempt at a smile. " Let's start shall we" He says walking over to me with a red light "open up"

My heart is giddy. I can't believe it. Me out of all people. I can't wait to tell Peeta. He'll be so happy. I walk the hallway with a hope in my heart. A hope for a better future. I walk around a bend where I see him. He has an anxious look on his face and he's rubbing his hands in his hair. I see him look up his face nervous. i smile and nod my head. His eyes widen and he jumps up scaring the people around him. I see him run towards me. I've seen him run to protect me, help me and even attack me. But this is out of joy happiness. I can't blame him either. I can't contain my joy. How can I? We are having a child.