Lilies & Monsters

Prologue

"jag-eun lilli?"

I turned my eyes upward, blinking at up at the sky. My lips laid pursed tightly together. I refused to talk.

"Yeona-"

Tears pricked the edges of my eyes, before briefly slipping down my cheeks. I can't, and I won't look. I clutched my duffel bag until my knuckles turned white and kept walking. Forward. Left, right. Left, right. No looking back. I inhaled sharply, the cold winter air struggling down my throat. With my free hand, I tugged my light leather coat closer to my body. I was only a few feet away from the train station. I'm almost across the bridge. Almost to my escape away from this misery. I can just-

"Yeona," A firm, warm hand grabbed my arm, wrenching me back.

"Let me go," I stared into the open space, clenching my fists. Don't look back. Don't look back.

"Let me explain," Joonhyun said, clutching my arm tighter.

"I don't need you stupid excuses," I spat, trying to loosen his grip on my arm, "I'm leaving you and this dumb town."

"Jag-eun lilli," Joonhyun continued, "please. Just hear me out. You saw wrong-"

"Don't call me that," I whipped my head around, angry, "I told you we're done. Now let me go. I don't have time for this. I paid over fifty dollars for my train ticket."

"I...I never meant to hurt you," He whispered, deep brown eyes glittering.

"You never meant to hurt me?" I laughed hysterically, "Then why am I leaving? Did you not tell me that I'm a gold digger with no future? Or that I was hopeless without you?"

I tried walking away while Joonhyun stared speechless, but instead he wrenched me back, making me fall on my back, the wood digging into my skin. I was facing up to the sky, stunned by my fall. A heartbeat of silence fell between us.

"Didn't you promise that you'd never hurt me?" I said breathless for my fall.

Joonhyun's eyes met mine as fat, hot tears rolled down my face. His lips moved, but no sound came out. He was looking at his own hands, shaking his head.

Anger consumed me like fire spreading over a dry field of wheat. I pounced on my feet, using my heavy bag to hit Joonhyun squared in the head. The sound of his body thumping unconscious on the bridge wood rang like damning church bells. There was no going back. A horrible, wretched thought entered my head. I can get him to stop hurting me forever...

With unsteady hands, I dragged his body by his arms and used all my strength to toss him over the high bridge. I watched as he slipped over the rusting iron bars, and into the fog, vanishing into the river. A pit of empty darkness entered my heart as I kept staring at the fog below. Fear hit me fast and strong. It wasn't because I killed my love.

It was because I couldn't find it in me to care.