Dating Namjoon- how it started

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Oh god, what do I do? I really just want to pretend I didn't see him but it's way too late for that now. My friendship with Namjoon was great till he looked at me with those bunny puppet puppy eyes of his, looked down and then said, "lets date."

Sure i actually didn't like him at first

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Sure i actually didn't like him at first. That was the weird thing. He always just was a friend. The guy who would text you if you wanted ice cream when you were getting bored. The guy you actually had fun with at the movies. Even people thought you both were friends and not a couple so that would give you guys an excuse to hang out in public more often. But he was just a friend right?

And then there were no butterflies, no stop-my-heart-i-will-die beat, no breathlessness and that anxiety that feels equivalent to death. Granted, that happens rarely nowadays to people, and even rarely to me. (it's happened only once, with the love of my live, Hoseok)

But then that day.

Namjoon was always that bright intellectual kid, an honours student, class president, his rank always came within the top five students of the school. Needless to say he was a teacher's pet. He was even good at painting and doodling stuff and produced music and movies with the school club. Ah, so talented.

Even his personality was such that he wouldn't ever hurt a fly. In front of strangers and teachers, always polite and obedient but not in a loser kind of way. Like a it's-my-duty kind of way. In front of his friends and me he would have fun and loosen up but he would never cross the line. In fact Hoseok told me he was so pure that the worst thing he did was just get a virus on the school computer or something.

Anyway, he'd never disobey authorities or miss his responsibilities for parties or friends. When my parents moved to another city, schedules became hectic for me because my delivery time was shifted in the morning as it gets dark at night. I started getting late to school and was scolded almost everyday. Our homeroom teacher warned me I better not be late again one day. That day Namjoon and I were walking down to my house and he confessed he liked me. He's such a matter of fact guy, so straightforward that if he wants to date you, he'll just say, "I want to date you." I told him I needed time to think. The night I came home he had texted me the answers to the homework. Damn, maybe I could date him...

But I got late again the next day. As mr.lee was scolding me, I was about to cry profusely, Namjoon got up from his chair in front of the whole class. "Do you really have to humiliate her like this, teacher?" he said. the whole class fell silent. I was shook with the disbelief. Namjoon, standing up to a teacher? "She said she's sorry for god's sake" he said, leaving the teacher, me and the rest of the class, and maybe even himself, stunned.

And as I sat quietly down in my seat, trying to get as less attention as possible, I realized I felt it. The butterflies.

I stare abruptly into reality now at him staring at me as the cute newspaper boy gets off.

oh god

what have I done

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