THE B TEAM // Pretty Little Liars #WATTYS2014 #FANFICTION

Chapter 62: I Destroyed You

I’m sitting beside Holbrook on the curb, but all I can see is the distance.

He is tracing patterns on my left hand and when we sit next to each other there is no room for air to seep through.

Like we used to sit.

“The FBI-“ I start.

“The FBI aren’t after you,” he says softly, in his silky smooth voice.” I didn’t think you would pull down your security wall but I put my security system up just in case something went wrong. So if yours failed, mine was still there. Your safe.”

I’m silent.

Then out of the darkness he speaks. “It wasn’t supposed to end this way, you know. We were supposed to be happy.”

Those words carve me.

I lean my head gently against his shoulder. My tears start forming dark patches on his shirt.

“We were supposed to live long uncomplicated lives. We were supposed to see each other every day. We were supposed to be together,” he whispers.

His hands brush through my hair so gently and so lovingly I nearly break all over again.

“I destroyed you,” I say.

Because I truly did. Because even when I was messed up out of my mind with Alison I had always promised myself that I would never get Gabriel involved. That he was my peace. He was the eye of the storm. The calm.

And if I kept him out but within reach everything would just be perfect.

He doesn’t speak. He just lies down on the pavement, pulling me down with him so we are side by side, looking up at the night sky with all its empty stars.

“You never destroyed me, Alice. You awakened me. Never destroyed. But if it had to get destroyed, I can’t think of a better person than you, to do that. It was a pleasure to get my heart broken by you.” he says. He still has my hand, and he still is stroking it.

“I never wanted you to get hurt, Gabriel,” I say. Because I never did. Never in a million years. Never in another.

My hand automatically squeezes his back. My heart squeezes as well.

He rolls himself so he is facing me and leaning on his side. I just look at him.

His hair is still the soft shade of brown and his eyes are pools and couches and everything that is comfortable and I want to be back in them again. But I shouldn’t.

And I know, in that moment, that before I die, I will do something for this boy. Just for him. Because I’ve robbed him of a life of his family. Of his parents and sister. I can’t give him his parents back, but I can give him his sister.

And so I tell him, in the calmest way possible, “And that’s why I’m going to get Annie out.”

He is staring at me. I think this is the first time I’ve actually shocked him. I am sitting up abruptly and he is still lying on the floor shocked.

“I know you. I know you would never allow Annie to follow in your footsteps to be a part of the A team. So it wasn’t you that joined it first. It must’ve been her and you were just trying to protect her,” I say. Everything is slowly coming together.

He is slowly sitting up beside me. But every second or so, I notice him shivering with a brief glance to my lips.

“Yes,” he said slightly. Not looking at me. “It was for her, and you. I couldn’t see an opportunity were I would see you otherwise. It was Alison, and I knew you had to be involved. And lived with you too long to just simply let you go.”

I look at him gently. This night is filled with gentle looks.

He never wanted to leave me.

Holbrook’s face is filled with regret and hurt and a hint of agony.

He continues. “I was scared, the day that I left. Not of you. Never of you. But for Annie. And I didn’t know what to do but I had to do something. I didn’t know that what I would do I would regret. I just did. I don’t know when it started with her though. You know, The A team pestering my sister to join them. And for some reason, she accepted so easily. When I found out, you could imagine how furious I was. I did everything in my power to get her out of there. But she wouldn’t budge and I didn’t want to abandon her. What do you do if you don’t abandon? You join.”

He said it all out in one breath. Like he was tired and in misery all at once.

And the he says, “And on that day, I think I lost you all over again.”

I am standing up, fiercely. I look down to him, “I promise on my life, Gabriel Holbrook. That you won’t lose anyone ever again.”

And my mind begins to reel about saving Annie that I don't even see what happens next as i start stepping away.

Gabriel Holbrooks eyes match the fierceness of mine and he says, “Good. Because I can’t hesitate anymore. I lost you once and I am NOT going to lose you again.”

And he looks at me in a way I will never forget.

Because he grabs my arm and pulls me towards him and kisses me with the passion of a thousand flooding seas.

And I’m thinking.

How is it that our lips are perfectly molded to each other’s after all these years.

How is it that every bone in my body is just..shattering.

How is it that I lived years without this.

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#Don'tkillme

I still want to know what team you are on! Holbrook or Wesley?