The Heart Wants What It Wants

Long Last

A tale of a 15-year old student who fell head over heels with someone he could never get...

There he is, his bangs, his taut dri-fit shirt against his rippling muscles and his charming smile. There he is, making my heart flutter. There he is, talking to his best friend again.

I stared at him from my seat. Since Day 1, when we first met this year, we had never really interacted much other than the occasional glances to each other during class or the rare, "Do you need my help?" during class. Sure, he might be part of the popular clique. Sure, he is probably the hottest guy in school. But he was quiet and sweet. It was no wonder that when I first saw him, my heart fluttered for him. It was probably love, or some stupid crush but I didn't care.

As smart as people think I am, however, I might as well bury myself alive as over the holidays, I confessed to him over Instagram, acting on impulse. I had no second thoughts when I told him my identity and though he seems pretty accepting, he avoided me in school like I was the plague.

Now, about 7 months later, that memory was still fresh on my mind as if it had been burned into my memory, and I was cursed to live with it throughout my entire life.

I shook it off. So, what? My squad is accepting of me and some of my trusted classmates accepted me for who I am. I mustered the courage to ask him regarding the assigned Chemistry homework.

"Hey Rex! Umm... do you need help with that Chemistry worksheet? I heard-" he turned away from me.

Ugh. Why does this keep happening? I like him but sometimes... he can just be oh-so annoying! But, how can I possibly blame him? I-

"Hey, Ron. Urm... I think I may indeed need your help," Ron sighed as he put down his pen in exasperation.

I turned and smiled as I walked over to him. As I taught him how to calculate the number of moles for some Chemistry calculations, he beamed and thanked me as he furiously scribnled down his answer.

"Oei Ron!" a hand grabbed my shoulder as I spun around. "Are you gay for Rex?"

My eyes widened as I pulled my classmate into a corner, distancing myself from Rex.

"What are you talking about?" I hissed.

"Oh, Ron, always acting so innocent and pure when in actual fact, you're a hypocritical snake!" my spiteful classmate spat.

My classmate smiled as he walked off. I turned to Rex's seat, which was now vacant. My heart started pulpating quickly as tears welled up in my eyes. I ran to the washroom, unable to control my feelings anymore.

I slammed the cubicle door close as I knelt beside the toilet bowl, sobbing. Why me? Why the rumors? How did all these happen? Why my reputation? Why...? I could not think anymore. I am the captain of the most prestigious Basketball team in my school and the Westwrn Zone. And if word gets out about my little secret... my, no, my team's reputation will be as good as toast!

A knock came at my cubicle door as a familiar voice called my name.

"Hey... erm... Ron? Are you in there?" Rex questioned.

I sat in silence.

"Ron... if you wanna talk about it... I can offer a listening ear or even a shoulder to cry on..." Rex sighed. "I mean... I hear what Zack said just now and... and... it was pretty hurtful, I guess?"

"You guess? YOU GUESS?! Why don't you just leave me Rex? Be like everyone else! IGNORANT MUCH!" I shouted.

I screamed in frustration.

"BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE!" Rex exclaimed.

He took a deep breath.

"Truth is... I... I... I like you, Ron... more than a friendly manner. I've always been unsure of what my feelings are and now, here we are..." Rex sighed.

"Rex..." I sighed as I opened the cubicle door.

Rex looked at me with tears in his eyes. He hugged me as he whispered in my ear.

"I love you Ron. I really do..." Rex whispered.

There and then, my dreams were realised. My crush, liking me back? It was absurd. It was unbelievable. It was the truth. Though there was a slight feeling that he could be lying, I knew he wasnt. He couldn't. No matter what his tone is, there will always be that slight hint of honesty and a sense of legitamcy in whatever he says.

"I love you too Rex," I sighed as he stared into my eyes and gave me a long kiss on my lips.

Perhaps we were two strangers in two different places. But now, we found each other. At long last, I found someone like me.