Keep Me (ON HOLD)

Chapter 4: The Past

Hello Everyone. Somehow my chapter got removed so this a re-post. Please enjoy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sarah's P.O.V

It began when I was about 7 years old, I could tell that something was off about the way they treated me. I think I knew before too, just could not really comprehend it. I thought all parents acted that way towards their children. They were cold and often times verbally abusive. However, through those as some would call it. developmental years. I was never hit, the scars were on the inside. When I turned 14, that's when the physical abuse started. At first, it was just a slap here and there. Over time, it got to be more intense. Slapping was a gift, if that was the only form of discipline I got for my transgressions. Frequently, I was kicked in the stomach or the ribs. My arms and legs were slashed as my mother took a knife against my skin. I'd cry for hours, trying to patch myself back together. They always aimed for the body, parts I could cover with clothes. I guess it wasn't enough for them, I was stripped of that privilege I guess. Soon it moved to my face, or they would lock me in my bedroom and I would go unfed for days.

I took a deep breath, my eyes caught their's. Four eyes eyed me with an intensity I had to look away. I fiddled with my fingers, and continued. It was hard to be myself, that as lightly as I can put it. Each day, I woke up in fear of what the day would bring. Some days, I was left alone and some days, I would be dragged out of my room only to beaten and ridiculed. I never knew why parents did what they did. To this day, I still can't fathom a reason for it. Sometimes, I think it had something to do with who I dated but that would not cause repeated beatings. I remember the frequent trips to the hospital and how I would lie and say I was incredibly clumsy. How my father would grip my arm, to the outside world it would be seen as comforting his daughter. However, the grip would be painful, a reminder not to say a word to the doctor. A hand print would be imprinted on my arm for days, a second reminder of the force they could exhume.

I thought about running several times however, each time I stopped myself. Where would I go? What would I do? The thought of that stroked fear within me, perhaps I was weak and feeble-minded. I just was at a lost. So I endured it, I accepted it, I came to believe that was what I deserved. Day by day, my body felt weaker then I could ever imagine, it was struggle just to get out of the small cot I had. That's when I met David, I was fooled into thinking he was the one. What he really wanted was for me to be his play thing. I found that out quickly which benefited me since I didn't run to him but away from him.

I couldn't trust anyone, the big dream of someone I loved whisking me away were faltering. So I did something stupid, I broke out of my room based cell and ran. I ran faster than I ever thought possible. I remember holding my head to the sky and gazing at the clouds, feeling the warm breeze against my skin, the noise of the world almost greet me. I had never felt so alive, so free. I was moving forward, I didn't think about my next steps I was free. I didn't care to think. However, that was short lived, I thought I had more time to plan my next move. I guess they found out I was gone and came out searching for me. I was in a park at the time, watching parents play with their children. I saw my father get out of the car, his pace brisk and his face intense. The anger evident on his face that small children gripped their parents for comfort. I tried to run, I really did but he was quicker. How an old man could be quicker than a young girl sounds unlikely. I was so weak that when I started to run, I collapsed after I few short paces. I wanted to scream and kick instead I just laid there crying.

"Don't worry daughter when we get home, I'll take real good care of you." He said, sinister in my ear. I whimpered as he grabbed my arm, pulling me up to my feet and taking me back to the car. He put on his charm, assuring the people I was okay. The smile on his face was fake as they come.

As soon as we were out of prying eyes, he ordered me to the back seat as he drove back home. My anxiety was at its peak. I feared what would happen. I knew a beating was to come but what I thought was far from what he had in store.

I stopped talking and broke down. My eyes filled with large tears, waiting to drip down my face. I bawled my eyes out, I couldn't tell them anymore. I didn't want to. It was too painful, my heart hurt just gazing up at their faces and seeing the anger they exhibited on my behalf. I was weak, a piece of floating garbage. There hands encircled around my body, their warm hard bodies pressed against that my cool skin.

"Hush little one, you don't have to continue if you don't want to." Xavier says.

I shake me head, no matter how much I didn't want to continue. I had to tell them. I needed to get it off my chest. I sighed, just saying what happened made me shake with nerves. When my father and I got home. He threw me out of the car. My body hit the ground, leaving me with a scrape on my elbow. I saw my mother open the door, leaving it cracked. Her sinister smile evident on her face. My father grabbed my shirt collar pulling me up.

I walked with my head down as I whimpered in pain. The house felt cold as I entered. My mother smiled which was rare for her. I kept my head down, her face sending chills down my spine. "Please don't hurt me. I beg of you. Why do you do this to your own child?"

"Why you ask? Because we can't stand the sight of you. You are a stain upon us, on our name. We didn't want you to begin with but here you are. If you were obedient this wouldn't be a problem." My father yells. I wanted to scream, yell, hit them in the head. They spoke such nonsense. If they didn't want me, then why did they have me to begin with. Why couldn't they let me go.

My mother pulled my hair, making my neck jerk back. She pulled until we reached the basement, pushing me in she shut the door. I hear the dead bolt click, surrounding me in darkness. I screamed to be let out, to be let go. I promised I would never return. However, I was met with just silence. I sank down to the cold concrete floor. Sobbing, I wish I was dead, that would be my only escape.

Each day, they came down and beat me until I fell unconscious. Only for them to come back when I regained consciousness to beat me again. I was down there for what felt like weeks, only getting an old piece of bread and small cup of water that had to last the weeks. I felt and still feel worthless. My parents did a number on me and I don't know if I'll ever feel whole again.

When I met you guys, it took everything in my being to trust you even just the first steps of trust. I still feel like this is a dream and that I will wake up back in my old room. I nestled my head into the crook of Xavier's neck. Loud sobs escaped from my lips. He rubbed my back as I broke down. I couldn't speak anymore, it was too much. I just cried.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Not Edited

Thank you for your patience. It has taken me some time but here is the repost of chapter 4. I hope you enjoy it and please excuse the spelling and grammar mistakes.

Thank you